The Event

Alien Asian Hottie is injured but not dead, and Sterling goes to visit him, intent on finding out who the mole is. He's still unconscious, but The Dude in the Trunk is discovered and tells everyone that Simon is the bad guy. Sterling decides to investigate a bit, and notices that Simon hasn't aged since he was hired. He's not just a mole - he's an alien! Time for a DNA test, and time for Thomas to go in and switch out the blood samples. At the same time, another alien mole plants incriminating evidence at the coffeeshop with The Dude in the Trunk's fingerprints. It's all so convenient how everyone knows what everyone else is doing and how to stop it.

Simon regains consciousness, and Sterling tells him that he passed his DNA test, and that Murphy is the mole. Shouldn't they now DNA test that dude to confirm? No? Well, I guess if they did someone would just swoop in and change the samples anyway.

In the Land of People I Cannot Stomach, the reporter tells That Annoying Prick Sean and His Dumb Girlfriend all of her alien conspiracy theories, and digs through Dumb Girlfriend's dad's stuff. She finds a list of names and numbers - which of course they determine are codes, codes that That Annoying Prick Sean can crack.

You know what I'd love? If he worked really hard to figure out what the code was but then it turned out that it wasn't anything. Just a list. Alas, The Reporter takes them to one of those high-tech conspiracy dudes who has some kind of great encrypted system that will help Sean. The names are girls who have gone missing and the numbers refer to shell corporations. Mmm-kay.

Wait - Hal Holbrook is alive? He must be -- because he's on this show -- but I'd swear he died a year ago. He's the dude behind DB Sweeney and the whole Let's Kidnap Leila and/or Sean Movement. One of his teams hunts Sean and Leila down just after they crack the code, but those two wily idiots escape, albeit separated from The Conspiracy Nuts.

Dumb Girlfriend's sister is still alive, being held with other little girls -- but they're not just little girls! They're like deformed freaky people! OK, that actually scared me.

Over on the alien side of things, we learn that Sophia is Thomas's mother. They need some nuclear material in order to transport themselves back home.

Pointless Flashback of the Week: 14 years ago, Sterling was in love with a chick who turned out to be a Russian spy. When he got the heads-up from his daddy (who was also in the CIA), he confronted her and wanted to run away with her. But of course she wasn't having any of it. She didn't love you for your looks, you jackass. As she tried to run away, his daddy shot and killed her, letting Sterling take the credit for catching her.