Six years and it comes down to this. Two-and-a-half hours. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that Lost was a great show. Well, it started out great, lagged in the middle, and got good again. Might as well go out before it goes bad again, eh? It's ending tonight, and I'll definitely miss most of these characters (not you, Jack). Let's do this thing.
Off-Island: Jack's dad's body is delivered to the church by Oceanic, and Desmond is there to sign for it.
Hurley and Sayid pick up a drunk-ass Charlie for the concert. Charlie doesn't want to go, so Hurley totally tranqs him. Next, they make their way to a bar where Shannon and Boone are being accosted. When Sayid touches Shannon, they both have their flashbacks, and kiss. YAY SAYID AND SHANNON! I freaking loved them together. Boone was working with Hurley and arranged for Shannon to be there to meet Sayid. How. Effing. Sweet.
Sun is in the hospital recovering from her gunshot wound, and everything seems fine, even with the unborn baby. Juliet is her baby doctor so YAY JULIET! As Juliet is examining her, Sun has flashbacks to their time on the Island doing the same thing. Jin's flashbacks soon follow.
Jack begins operating on Locke. And it's revealed that Juliet is indeed Jack's son's mother. BOO! Juliet belongs with Sawyer. *pout* Jack doesn't deserve Juliet.
Backstage at the concert, Charlotte and Daniel meet up. YAY CHARLOTTE AND DANIEL! Then when he's on stage, Charlie sees Claire. YAY CHARLIE AND CLAIRE! OK, so there are quite a few couples on this show that I desperately love.
Claire goes into labor backstage, and Kate and Charlie are there to help (just like on the Island). It's at that point that Kate has her flashback to the Island. And it's at that point I gag at the sight of spoogy baby. Then Charlie and Claire have their flashbacks.
On the Island: Jack, the newly-Christened Protector of the Island, tells the crew that they have to travel to The Heart of the Island to protect it from Smokey. Desmond is with Rose and Bernard (and Vincent) in their happy little Retirement Camp. It's not happy for long though - Smokey and Ben walk in. I yell out, "Don't kill Rose" at this point. Smokey threatens to kill Rose and Bernard unless Desmond goes with him, and so Desmond does. Thank you, Desmond.
Miles is with Richard, who is alive after being thrown by Smokey. Richard has a gray hair, realizes he wants to live, and they set out to blow up the plane. As they row over to it, they come upon Frank in the water. YAY FRANK! Now instead of blowing up the plane, Frank plans on piloting them out on it.
The 2 teams meet up and Jack and Locke face off, with Jack telling Locke he's going to kill him once they're at the Heart of the Island. They all trek off, and once they get to a certain point, Locke says it should just be him, Jack, and Desmond the rest of the way. They arrive at the light cave thingy, and Desmond tells Jack about the Off-Island World, where they all survived and everyone is happy, and says that's where he'll go when he goes into the cave.
Desmond is lowered down into the cave, where there are a few skeletons and, well, a light. When he reaches the light, the electromagnetic forces start going through him, eventually the light goes out, and a big Island-is-being-destroyed earthquake starts. Jack and Locke start fighting, and Locke starts bleeding. I'm actually rooting for Jack at this point. They have an Epic Rain Battle on a cliff that ends with Locke stabbing Jack through the gut. Then Kate comes up behind and shoots Locke in the back, and Jack kicks him off the cliff.
At this point let's go Off-Island, where Jack's neck is bleeding again (bleeding like Jack on the Island, with Locke's knifepoint at his throat). Locke comes to after the surgery and says it worked, that he can feel his legs already. Sure enough, he starts moving his feet. At this point, Locke has his flashback. Jack has one flashback, but then dismisses it.
On the Island the quaking continues and Frank continues to try to get the plane working. Jack says he's staying behind to turn the light back on and save the Island, and Ben and Hurley stay with him. Kate and Jack say their goodbyes and confess their love, and if I cared about them as a couple, I'd be crying, but I don't so I don't.
Off-Island Sawyer comes to the hospital to check on Sun. Sun and Jin are happy to see him because dammit but he and Jin were BFFs!!! Sun is being discharged, and says, "We'll see you there."
As Sawyer's trying to get a candy bar out of the vending machine, Juliet walks in. I gasp happily. They have their flashbacks and make me the happiest person on Earth!!!!!!!!! OK, I could be crying now.
Jack heads to the concert and runs into - of course - Kate. She touches him, and he has some flashbacks, but doesn't fully understand (Jack is slow), so Kate tells him to come with her.
On the Island, Jack says he's going to sacrifice himself to turn the light back on, and tells Hurley that he's to be the real Protector. YAY HURLEY! They do the drinking ritual thing and now Hurley's the Protector. Jack gets to the bottom of the cave, finds Desmond, and sends Desmond back up to the surface. Jack moves the statue thing that gets the light thing back up and running.
Ben agrees to work as Hurley's second-in-command, taking care of the Island and figuring out a way to get Desmond home.
Frank gets the plane running. Kate and Sawyer collect Claire, make their way to the plane, and Frank flies them off the Island.
Off the Island, everyone ends up gathering at the church where Jack's dad's body is being held. Ben apologizes to Locke for all he did to him, and Locke forgives him. Locke walks into the church, but Ben says he's not going inside.
Kate and Jack arrive, and she tells him to come in when he's ready to leave. LEAVE WHAT!?
On the Island, Jack is on the surface now, alive, stumbling around.
Off the Island, Jack enters the church through the back. He sees his dad's coffin, and when he touches it he gets his full flashbacks. He opens the coffin and there's nothing inside. Instead, his dad is in the room and that's when we realize that Jack is dead now. Everyone in the church is dead, in fact. They all gathered to be together in the afterlife. They all reunite happily and I lose my shit, but in a happy way. If Lost does one thing well it's those end-of-episode slow-motion montages. Christ. AND PENNY'S THERE TOO!
On the Island, Jack dies, with Vincent at his side.
This thing was epic on so many levels, and a really fitting end to the show. Loads of stuff is still a mystery, but you also just get a happy ending for everyone. And that makes me happy. I didn't need this show to end all depressing. So it seems the Island-as-Purgatory theory was semi-accurate. And I'm a blubbering mess. Jesus. Great final episode.
Showing posts with label Lost. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lost. Show all posts
23 May 2010
18 May 2010
Lost
After last week's detour into the history of Jacob and the Man In Black, we're here, less than a week from the end. This show is killing me.
Off the Island
Jack wakes up and has some blood on his neck. Hasn't this happened before, where like Island Injuries come bleeding into the Off-Island World?
He has breakfast with his son and Claire, and you know what - his kid's mom better not be Juliet or I'll lose my S. Juliet belongs with Sawyer. Anyway, he gets a call from Oceanic Airlines that they've found his father's coffin - only it's really Desmond calling him.
Desmond shows up to Ben and Locke's school, tells Ben that he is trying to get Locke to "let go" and proceeds to beat the crap out of Ben. As he beats him up, Ben has Island Memories.
Then Desmond goes to the police station and turns himself in to Sawyer and Miles for the hit-and-run and assault. This is the point where I start freaking out in the hopes that Desmond will be trying to reunite Juliet and Sawyer. And then I start imagining Miles as the Best Man. For now, though, Desmond's just in holding -- along with Sayid and Kate. We're getting the band back together!!! As they're being transported from the station, Desmond tells them they can break out. The driver of the police vehicle is Ana-Lucia, who pulls over and lets them escape (Desmond pays her off with Hurley's money).
Desmond gives Kate a dress and tells her they're going to a concert, and sends Sayid off with Hurley.
Locke goes to see Jack because Jack had said the same thing Desmond did, about "letting go." He's wondering if all of this is happening for a reason, if it's destiny that Jack fix him. Locke's ready to try the surgery.
On the Island
Kate, Jack, Hurley, and Sawyer want Locke dead for killing Sayid, Jin, and Sun. I agree. It's totally crappy that Locke didn't kill Jack instead. They set off to get Desmond out of the well, and Sawyer's all torn up from guilt. It's official - this show is all about Sawyer for me.
Hurley gets a jungle visit from the kid again - it's young Jacob, who turns into adult Jacob. Jacob says that he'll explain to the group why everyone has died, and that he'll tell them everything about protecting the Island - because one of them has to take over tonight.
Meanwhile, Team Awesome - Ben, Miles, and Richard - walk their awesome asses through the jungle to get some C-4 Ben had hidden so they can blow the plane to hell and prevent Locke from escaping. Widmore is there to greet them, and tells them he has already rigged the plane with explosives. Locke's on his way over and Richard volunteers to talk to him, maybe try to get him to leave with him and save everyone else.
Smokey shows up and takes out Richard, then Smokey Locke walks over to Ben. Locke needs Ben to kill a few people for him, and Ben agrees, quickly turning over Widmore and Liz Lemon. Locke slashes Liz Lemon's throat and tells Widmore that he's getting off the Island and the first thing he's going to do is kill Penny. Widmore whispers something to Locke, but then Ben shoots him dead. Damn, and here I was hoping Ben was setting a trap for Locke but it seems like he's totally on board with being his assassin. Locke's ready to find Desmond and make him destroy the Island with him.
Meanwhile, around the campfire, Jacob tells the group that he chose them because they were flawed and weren't happy in their lives. So he brought them here to be candidates to protect the Island. Once Kate became a mother caring for Aaron, Jacob had crossed her name from the list of candidates. He tasks them with choosing who will be the Protector, with the job of protecting the light at the center of the Island, and killing Smokey Locke. Jack volunteers. Of course he does. Jack wants to fix everything at all times.
Jacob does the whole cup ritual that his mother had done with him last episode, and passes on responsibility for the Island to Jack.
Off the Island
Jack wakes up and has some blood on his neck. Hasn't this happened before, where like Island Injuries come bleeding into the Off-Island World?
He has breakfast with his son and Claire, and you know what - his kid's mom better not be Juliet or I'll lose my S. Juliet belongs with Sawyer. Anyway, he gets a call from Oceanic Airlines that they've found his father's coffin - only it's really Desmond calling him.
Desmond shows up to Ben and Locke's school, tells Ben that he is trying to get Locke to "let go" and proceeds to beat the crap out of Ben. As he beats him up, Ben has Island Memories.
Then Desmond goes to the police station and turns himself in to Sawyer and Miles for the hit-and-run and assault. This is the point where I start freaking out in the hopes that Desmond will be trying to reunite Juliet and Sawyer. And then I start imagining Miles as the Best Man. For now, though, Desmond's just in holding -- along with Sayid and Kate. We're getting the band back together!!! As they're being transported from the station, Desmond tells them they can break out. The driver of the police vehicle is Ana-Lucia, who pulls over and lets them escape (Desmond pays her off with Hurley's money).
Desmond gives Kate a dress and tells her they're going to a concert, and sends Sayid off with Hurley.
Locke goes to see Jack because Jack had said the same thing Desmond did, about "letting go." He's wondering if all of this is happening for a reason, if it's destiny that Jack fix him. Locke's ready to try the surgery.
On the Island
Kate, Jack, Hurley, and Sawyer want Locke dead for killing Sayid, Jin, and Sun. I agree. It's totally crappy that Locke didn't kill Jack instead. They set off to get Desmond out of the well, and Sawyer's all torn up from guilt. It's official - this show is all about Sawyer for me.
Hurley gets a jungle visit from the kid again - it's young Jacob, who turns into adult Jacob. Jacob says that he'll explain to the group why everyone has died, and that he'll tell them everything about protecting the Island - because one of them has to take over tonight.
Meanwhile, Team Awesome - Ben, Miles, and Richard - walk their awesome asses through the jungle to get some C-4 Ben had hidden so they can blow the plane to hell and prevent Locke from escaping. Widmore is there to greet them, and tells them he has already rigged the plane with explosives. Locke's on his way over and Richard volunteers to talk to him, maybe try to get him to leave with him and save everyone else.
Smokey shows up and takes out Richard, then Smokey Locke walks over to Ben. Locke needs Ben to kill a few people for him, and Ben agrees, quickly turning over Widmore and Liz Lemon. Locke slashes Liz Lemon's throat and tells Widmore that he's getting off the Island and the first thing he's going to do is kill Penny. Widmore whispers something to Locke, but then Ben shoots him dead. Damn, and here I was hoping Ben was setting a trap for Locke but it seems like he's totally on board with being his assassin. Locke's ready to find Desmond and make him destroy the Island with him.
Meanwhile, around the campfire, Jacob tells the group that he chose them because they were flawed and weren't happy in their lives. So he brought them here to be candidates to protect the Island. Once Kate became a mother caring for Aaron, Jacob had crossed her name from the list of candidates. He tasks them with choosing who will be the Protector, with the job of protecting the light at the center of the Island, and killing Smokey Locke. Jack volunteers. Of course he does. Jack wants to fix everything at all times.
Jacob does the whole cup ritual that his mother had done with him last episode, and passes on responsibility for the Island to Jack.
11 May 2010
Lost: All About Jacob
A pregnant chick washes up on The Island, and is saved by Allison Janney. The woman delivers a boy, and his name is Jacob. Then she delivers a second boy, who disappointingly does not come out in a puff of black smoke. After the second kid is born, Allison Janney clubs the chick to death. Did the Bad Baby make her do it?
Next they're 13 years old, playing a game on the beach and chasing down a boar. That's when they discover that there are other inhabitants on the island, and they tell Mama. Mama tells them that they are the only ones who belong on The Island, that they're here for a reason. She also says she's made it so they can never hurt each other. She leads them to a tunnel thing with a warm, bright light coming out of it. She says there's a little of that light in every person, and if this light goes out, it goes out everywhere, and it's their job to protect it. Ugh. Sacred light? Really?
The Dark Kid (he hasn't been named yet, because I guess they want to pull a Cosmo Kramer and have his name be a big reveal) is visited by a vision of his real mother, who tells him who she is, that the other people are part of the ship she wrecked on, and that there is indeed a world outside of The Island.
Dark Kid leaves Allison Janney and Jacob to join the others, but Goody Two-Shoes Jacob won't go.
Next they're the adults we know, and Jacob sneaks away to meet with The Man In Black from time to time. MIB says that the others are indeed manipulative, flawed people, but that he's using them to get off The Island.
Jacob tells Allison Janney that MIB wants off The Island, and she goes to see him. He shows her that he has found that light source she showed him as a child - and he's creating a system that will channel the light, and by turning a wheel he'll be able to get off The Island. That's kind of a major leap.
Then Allison Janney kills MIB by smashing his head into the wall. She takes Jacob back to the Light Tunnel, tells him it's the source of life, and then tells him he can never seek it out - or something worse than death will happen. She anoints him as the protector of The Island.
OK, but MIB isn't dead because he wakes up in the middle of the forest to find that his camp has been destroyed, and all of his people killed. He, in turn, shows up at Allison Janney's camp and stabs her dead.
Jacob finds them and beats the crap out of MIB (he can't kill him, you'll recall). He takes MIB to the Light Tunnel and throws him into it. The ground starts to shake and black smoke erupts from the tunnel. Eh sure, why not, that makes about as much sense as any other explanation for how a person became a Smoke Monster.
And then we find out that MIB and Allison Janney are the 2 bodies that Jack and Kate found way way way back in Season 1 or whatever. I don't care. Jacob is a sullen twat with an inferiority complex. I don't care about Jacob. You know what I care about? Sawyer and Juliet being together. Miles and Ben. That's who I care about.
Next they're 13 years old, playing a game on the beach and chasing down a boar. That's when they discover that there are other inhabitants on the island, and they tell Mama. Mama tells them that they are the only ones who belong on The Island, that they're here for a reason. She also says she's made it so they can never hurt each other. She leads them to a tunnel thing with a warm, bright light coming out of it. She says there's a little of that light in every person, and if this light goes out, it goes out everywhere, and it's their job to protect it. Ugh. Sacred light? Really?
The Dark Kid (he hasn't been named yet, because I guess they want to pull a Cosmo Kramer and have his name be a big reveal) is visited by a vision of his real mother, who tells him who she is, that the other people are part of the ship she wrecked on, and that there is indeed a world outside of The Island.
Dark Kid leaves Allison Janney and Jacob to join the others, but Goody Two-Shoes Jacob won't go.
Next they're the adults we know, and Jacob sneaks away to meet with The Man In Black from time to time. MIB says that the others are indeed manipulative, flawed people, but that he's using them to get off The Island.
Jacob tells Allison Janney that MIB wants off The Island, and she goes to see him. He shows her that he has found that light source she showed him as a child - and he's creating a system that will channel the light, and by turning a wheel he'll be able to get off The Island. That's kind of a major leap.
Then Allison Janney kills MIB by smashing his head into the wall. She takes Jacob back to the Light Tunnel, tells him it's the source of life, and then tells him he can never seek it out - or something worse than death will happen. She anoints him as the protector of The Island.
OK, but MIB isn't dead because he wakes up in the middle of the forest to find that his camp has been destroyed, and all of his people killed. He, in turn, shows up at Allison Janney's camp and stabs her dead.
Jacob finds them and beats the crap out of MIB (he can't kill him, you'll recall). He takes MIB to the Light Tunnel and throws him into it. The ground starts to shake and black smoke erupts from the tunnel. Eh sure, why not, that makes about as much sense as any other explanation for how a person became a Smoke Monster.
And then we find out that MIB and Allison Janney are the 2 bodies that Jack and Kate found way way way back in Season 1 or whatever. I don't care. Jacob is a sullen twat with an inferiority complex. I don't care about Jacob. You know what I care about? Sawyer and Juliet being together. Miles and Ben. That's who I care about.
04 May 2010
Lost
We open Off-Island, with Locke regaining consciousness post-surgery (after being hit by Desmond's car). Jack tells him he's a candidate for a new procedure to cure his paralysis, but Locke's not interested.
Jack visits Locke's dentist (Bernard) to get the details on Locke's paralysis. Wait - from his dentist? I missed something, surely. Anyway, Bernard tells Jack that Locke was involved in an accident with another man, Anthony Cooper.
Jack tracks Anthony (Locke's father) down to a nursing home where he's a drooling vegetable. Jesus, Jack can never leave well enough alone. Locke's accident was a plane crash - it was Locke's first flight as a newly-trained pilot. Jack's busy-body fix-everything ass wants Locke to let go of the guilt and get himself fixed instead of letting himself suffer like his father is. Locke still ain't buying it.
On the Island, Widmore's guys locks the Losties up in cages and set up the anti-Smokey perimeter. The power to the perimeter is cut, and then Smokey and Jack let everyone out of the cages.
They all head to the crashed plane. Locke finds a bomb on board and claims that Widmore planted it there - he wanted to lure everyone onto the plane and then kill them. This means everyone has to take the submarine to get off the Island.
I really love everyone all working on the same team, sneaking out to the dock to hijack the sub. There's a shootout, Kate is shot, and Jack pushes Locke into the water. Everyone but Claire and Locke make it on the sub. As Jack starts to work on Kate's bullet wound, he finds a bomb inside his backpack, a bomb with less than 4 minutes on the timer. Time to go back up to the surface.
Jack tells everyone it'll be OK - Locke can't kill them, that he's not allowed to, and instead he's trying to get them to kill each other. Huh? Sawyer doesn't buy it and tries to disarm the bomb, but it doesn't work. Sayid tells Jack where to find Desmond then runs away with the bomb, sacrificing himself. R.I.P. Sayid. Again. Hey, at least the bomb didn't rip a hole in the sub. Oh wait, it did. It also looks like it killed Frank, which makes me bitter. R.I.P. Frank.
As they're all trying to escape, Sawyer is hit over the head with something and Sun is pinned against the wall. Jack takes Sawyer out, and Jin stays behind with Sun. Jesus Christ, are they going to kill everyone tonight!? R.I.P. Jin and Sun. THIS SUCKS!
At least we get a glimpse of Off-Island Jin in the hospital at the end, visiting Sun.
Hurley, Jack, Kate, and Sawyer meet up on the beach and they're all pretty torn up, especially Jack. Tragically, Jack does not commit suicide in his despair. Locke knows they're not all dead, and heads off to finish what he started.
Hey, I got a question. Where's Miles!? Did he die and I blocked it out?
Jack visits Locke's dentist (Bernard) to get the details on Locke's paralysis. Wait - from his dentist? I missed something, surely. Anyway, Bernard tells Jack that Locke was involved in an accident with another man, Anthony Cooper.
Jack tracks Anthony (Locke's father) down to a nursing home where he's a drooling vegetable. Jesus, Jack can never leave well enough alone. Locke's accident was a plane crash - it was Locke's first flight as a newly-trained pilot. Jack's busy-body fix-everything ass wants Locke to let go of the guilt and get himself fixed instead of letting himself suffer like his father is. Locke still ain't buying it.
On the Island, Widmore's guys locks the Losties up in cages and set up the anti-Smokey perimeter. The power to the perimeter is cut, and then Smokey and Jack let everyone out of the cages.
They all head to the crashed plane. Locke finds a bomb on board and claims that Widmore planted it there - he wanted to lure everyone onto the plane and then kill them. This means everyone has to take the submarine to get off the Island.
I really love everyone all working on the same team, sneaking out to the dock to hijack the sub. There's a shootout, Kate is shot, and Jack pushes Locke into the water. Everyone but Claire and Locke make it on the sub. As Jack starts to work on Kate's bullet wound, he finds a bomb inside his backpack, a bomb with less than 4 minutes on the timer. Time to go back up to the surface.
Jack tells everyone it'll be OK - Locke can't kill them, that he's not allowed to, and instead he's trying to get them to kill each other. Huh? Sawyer doesn't buy it and tries to disarm the bomb, but it doesn't work. Sayid tells Jack where to find Desmond then runs away with the bomb, sacrificing himself. R.I.P. Sayid. Again. Hey, at least the bomb didn't rip a hole in the sub. Oh wait, it did. It also looks like it killed Frank, which makes me bitter. R.I.P. Frank.
As they're all trying to escape, Sawyer is hit over the head with something and Sun is pinned against the wall. Jack takes Sawyer out, and Jin stays behind with Sun. Jesus Christ, are they going to kill everyone tonight!? R.I.P. Jin and Sun. THIS SUCKS!
At least we get a glimpse of Off-Island Jin in the hospital at the end, visiting Sun.
Hurley, Jack, Kate, and Sawyer meet up on the beach and they're all pretty torn up, especially Jack. Tragically, Jack does not commit suicide in his despair. Locke knows they're not all dead, and heads off to finish what he started.
Hey, I got a question. Where's Miles!? Did he die and I blocked it out?
20 April 2010
Lost
It's Jack/Locke face-off time, and the men go off to the side to talk it out. Maybe this is the first time they've come face-to-face? Must be. Jack asks if Smokey ever looked like his father. Yes - Smokey took that form to help Jack find water on his third day on the Island.
Smokey Locke is trying to get everyone to gather together and get off the Island. Sawyer has plans to take his select few (normal, living, non-crazy) people to a boat and ditch Locke. When Jack breaks Sun, Frank, and Hurley off from Locke's path, Claire watches and follows -- and she's pissed about being abandoned again. Kate had promised that she'd take Claire back to Aaron, and so Kate insists she come with. You don't want that kind of crazy on a tiny boat with the rest of you.
Smokey Locke sends Sayid to kill Desmond at the bottom of the not-as-deep-as-I-thought well. Sayid tells Locke he did it, but I don't think he did.
Sawyer & Company sail off and I'm kind of bitter Miles isn't with the group. Where the hell did he go again? Jack's wondering if maybe they should all be staying on the Island because it's not done with them yet. Sawyer's all, You can get off the damn boat, I ain't goin' back. And Jack gets off the damn boat and swims back to the Island and Locke.
When the boat makes it ashore, Sun and Jin reunite on the beach and I had forgotten that she has basically thought he was dead for the past 3 years. Awwww, how sweet. Also, she gets her ability to speak English back. Awwww, how convenient.
That Liz Lemon chick holds Sawyer & Company at gunpoint and then fires missiles or something over in Locke's direction. Tragically, they don't appear to hit Jack in the face.
Non-Island Action:
Locke is en route to the hospital after being run over by Desmond. He's brought in at the same time as Sun and her gunshot wound. Sun seems to recognize Locke.
My favorite buddy cop team of Sawyer and Miles arrest Sayid for Sun's shooting and the murders.
Desmond runs into Claire on her way to the adoption agency and convinces her to see a lawyer -- that chick whose ass blew up last week. Coincidentally, she was actually looking for Claire because... Jack and his son go to a reading of their dad's will (cuz that's fun bonding time). Claire tells him that they share a dad, and then Jack is called off for an emergency at the hospital, that emergency being... Locke. Sun's OK, by the way, and I guess a gunshot to the uterus isn't harmful to babies after all.
Smokey Locke is trying to get everyone to gather together and get off the Island. Sawyer has plans to take his select few (normal, living, non-crazy) people to a boat and ditch Locke. When Jack breaks Sun, Frank, and Hurley off from Locke's path, Claire watches and follows -- and she's pissed about being abandoned again. Kate had promised that she'd take Claire back to Aaron, and so Kate insists she come with. You don't want that kind of crazy on a tiny boat with the rest of you.
Smokey Locke sends Sayid to kill Desmond at the bottom of the not-as-deep-as-I-thought well. Sayid tells Locke he did it, but I don't think he did.
Sawyer & Company sail off and I'm kind of bitter Miles isn't with the group. Where the hell did he go again? Jack's wondering if maybe they should all be staying on the Island because it's not done with them yet. Sawyer's all, You can get off the damn boat, I ain't goin' back. And Jack gets off the damn boat and swims back to the Island and Locke.
When the boat makes it ashore, Sun and Jin reunite on the beach and I had forgotten that she has basically thought he was dead for the past 3 years. Awwww, how sweet. Also, she gets her ability to speak English back. Awwww, how convenient.
That Liz Lemon chick holds Sawyer & Company at gunpoint and then fires missiles or something over in Locke's direction. Tragically, they don't appear to hit Jack in the face.
Non-Island Action:
Locke is en route to the hospital after being run over by Desmond. He's brought in at the same time as Sun and her gunshot wound. Sun seems to recognize Locke.
My favorite buddy cop team of Sawyer and Miles arrest Sayid for Sun's shooting and the murders.
Desmond runs into Claire on her way to the adoption agency and convinces her to see a lawyer -- that chick whose ass blew up last week. Coincidentally, she was actually looking for Claire because... Jack and his son go to a reading of their dad's will (cuz that's fun bonding time). Claire tells him that they share a dad, and then Jack is called off for an emergency at the hospital, that emergency being... Locke. Sun's OK, by the way, and I guess a gunshot to the uterus isn't harmful to babies after all.
14 April 2010
Lost
Non-Island Hurley is being honored for his charitable good works, done with the money from his chicken empire. His mom still isn't happy though, because Hurley needs a woman.
She hooks Hurley up on a blind date, but he runs into Libby at the restaurant instead. She recognizes him because she says they're soulmates. "You don't remember me, do you?" she asks. She says he's an old friend, and then her doctor comes over and takes her away. So is she nuts or does she actually recall the time on the Island? Whatever the case, I love that a mental hospital takes patients on a field trip to a Mexican restaurant, complete with the van and everything. Fun times.
Desmond and Hurley meet in a Mr. Cluck's, and Hurley tells him about his nutsy encounter with Libby. This piques Desmond's interest of course because of his whole destiny thing. Desmond is going around trying to get people to remember their Island lovers, right?
Hurley heads to the mental hospital, strokes a check for 100 grand, and gets in to see Libby. She says that when she saw him on TV she got a rush of sudden memories of some other life. She remembers a plane crash and that they liked each other, and she also remembers him being at the mental hospital with her before. He doesn't remember her, but asks her out on a date (she's in the hospital voluntarily, so she can leave).
They have a picnic on the beach and Libby gets déjà vu from it. When they kiss, Hurley totally gets flashes of Island memories. OH SNAP! Desmond witnesses this and then drives off, all successful in his dual-reality matchmaking.
Island Hurley visits Libby's grave, where he is visited by a vision of Michael. Michael says he wants to prevent Hurley from killing everyone. See, Richard and company want to blow up the plane to prevent Smokey from flying off the Island. So That One Chick gets some dynamite from the Black Rock - and when Hurley tries to warn her not to do it - she blows the eff up. R.I.P. That chick with the accent who was hella devoted to Jacob. BAM!
Despite the blowing up, Richard is ready to get more dynamite and go. Hurley stop him from doing that by... blowing up all the dynamite. Hurley says they have to go talk to Locke, but Richard doesn't wanna. Ben agrees to go with Richard to find some explosives elsewhere, and Miles goes with.
On their way through the jungle, everyone hears the whispers, and Hurley knows what they are - dead souls stuck on the Island.
Sayid shows back up at Smokey!Locke's camp, bringing Desmond with him. Well actually, he has Desmond tied to a tree and brings Locke to him.
Desmond and Locke go walking and see a boy in the jungle. Locke tells him to ignore the boy and walks away. He takes Desmond to an old well, they talk for a bit, and then Locke throws Desmond down into it. Nooooo! Locke comes back to the camp, sans Desmond, just as Hurley and company walk in. Alright, so now most everyone is all together again. There's a weird Jack/Locke face-off complete with ominous music and close-ups and then we're back to Off Island.
Non-Island Desmond is watching as Locke wheels himself down the road outside his school. Ben comes over to make sure Desmond isn't a perv. Desmond then plows his car into Locke and runs his crippled ass over. OH HOLY HELL! That was kind of funny. Ben comes running over to help Locke. The end. And dammit - I don't get a preview because I'm watching online. Dagger!
Wait - does this mean Locke and Ben are soulmates?
She hooks Hurley up on a blind date, but he runs into Libby at the restaurant instead. She recognizes him because she says they're soulmates. "You don't remember me, do you?" she asks. She says he's an old friend, and then her doctor comes over and takes her away. So is she nuts or does she actually recall the time on the Island? Whatever the case, I love that a mental hospital takes patients on a field trip to a Mexican restaurant, complete with the van and everything. Fun times.
Desmond and Hurley meet in a Mr. Cluck's, and Hurley tells him about his nutsy encounter with Libby. This piques Desmond's interest of course because of his whole destiny thing. Desmond is going around trying to get people to remember their Island lovers, right?
Hurley heads to the mental hospital, strokes a check for 100 grand, and gets in to see Libby. She says that when she saw him on TV she got a rush of sudden memories of some other life. She remembers a plane crash and that they liked each other, and she also remembers him being at the mental hospital with her before. He doesn't remember her, but asks her out on a date (she's in the hospital voluntarily, so she can leave).
They have a picnic on the beach and Libby gets déjà vu from it. When they kiss, Hurley totally gets flashes of Island memories. OH SNAP! Desmond witnesses this and then drives off, all successful in his dual-reality matchmaking.
Island Hurley visits Libby's grave, where he is visited by a vision of Michael. Michael says he wants to prevent Hurley from killing everyone. See, Richard and company want to blow up the plane to prevent Smokey from flying off the Island. So That One Chick gets some dynamite from the Black Rock - and when Hurley tries to warn her not to do it - she blows the eff up. R.I.P. That chick with the accent who was hella devoted to Jacob. BAM!
Despite the blowing up, Richard is ready to get more dynamite and go. Hurley stop him from doing that by... blowing up all the dynamite. Hurley says they have to go talk to Locke, but Richard doesn't wanna. Ben agrees to go with Richard to find some explosives elsewhere, and Miles goes with.
On their way through the jungle, everyone hears the whispers, and Hurley knows what they are - dead souls stuck on the Island.
Sayid shows back up at Smokey!Locke's camp, bringing Desmond with him. Well actually, he has Desmond tied to a tree and brings Locke to him.
Desmond and Locke go walking and see a boy in the jungle. Locke tells him to ignore the boy and walks away. He takes Desmond to an old well, they talk for a bit, and then Locke throws Desmond down into it. Nooooo! Locke comes back to the camp, sans Desmond, just as Hurley and company walk in. Alright, so now most everyone is all together again. There's a weird Jack/Locke face-off complete with ominous music and close-ups and then we're back to Off Island.
Non-Island Desmond is watching as Locke wheels himself down the road outside his school. Ben comes over to make sure Desmond isn't a perv. Desmond then plows his car into Locke and runs his crippled ass over. OH HOLY HELL! That was kind of funny. Ben comes running over to help Locke. The end. And dammit - I don't get a preview because I'm watching online. Dagger!
Wait - does this mean Locke and Ben are soulmates?
06 April 2010
Lost
I had forgotten that Desmond was shot by Ben back in Los Angeles, but the show reminds me. Now Charles Widmore has him on the Island and is all, "The island isn't done with you yet."
Widmore's crew is working on a series of WTF experiments. I quite literally have no idea how to explain them. There's a giant coil, an electric pulse, a white rabbit, and a dude gets burned and dies. Desmond's put into the box with the giant coil next. Widmore says that Desmond is able to survive a large electromagnetic event, and so he'll be fine. Indeed, the electric pulse coil thing happens, and Desmond is all like electrified and stuff, but he survives.
Non-Island Desmond works for Charles Widmore and seems to get along great with him. Charles sends Desmond to fetch the recently-arrested Charlie, whose band is supposed to play at some Widmore event.
As they're driving, Charlie jerks the steering wheel and sends them careening into the harbor. Under the water, Charlie puts his hand up to the window and Desmond gets a déjà vu feeling - and actually sees a flash of Charlie doing the same thing with the whole "Not Penny's Boat" drowning incident on the Island.
At the hospital, Desmond is given an MRI, and sees flashes of memories that... well... didn't happen for him but happened for the Other Desmond. He sees Penny and his son and all that.
Mrs. Widmore is Eloise, and she's as strange and cryptic as ever. My man Daniel Faraday - hells yes! - is Daniel Widmore now - the offspring of Eloise and Charles. He wasn't before, right? He was just Eloise's son, at least that's the only parent we knew. Anyway, he approaches Desmond and shows him some crazy physics equations he recently wrote - only this Daniel is a musician, not a physicist. He asks Desmond, "What if this wasn't supposed to be our life? What if we had some other life and for some reason we changed things?" He must smoke a lot of weed as a musician. Desmond and Daniel discuss their weird déjà vu feelings related to their respective chicks. Daniel tells Desmond that Penny is his half-sister, and where to find her. They meet, and it's adorable, and I remember how much I love Desmond and Penny.
At that moment, we're taken back to the Island, where Desmond has survived his electromagnetic event. He has apparently had those flash-sideways as memories, and now he's all-in on helping Widmore on the Island.
As Desmond's walking through the jungle with Widmore's people, Sayid ambushes them and tells Desmond to follow him.
Widmore's crew is working on a series of WTF experiments. I quite literally have no idea how to explain them. There's a giant coil, an electric pulse, a white rabbit, and a dude gets burned and dies. Desmond's put into the box with the giant coil next. Widmore says that Desmond is able to survive a large electromagnetic event, and so he'll be fine. Indeed, the electric pulse coil thing happens, and Desmond is all like electrified and stuff, but he survives.
Non-Island Desmond works for Charles Widmore and seems to get along great with him. Charles sends Desmond to fetch the recently-arrested Charlie, whose band is supposed to play at some Widmore event.
As they're driving, Charlie jerks the steering wheel and sends them careening into the harbor. Under the water, Charlie puts his hand up to the window and Desmond gets a déjà vu feeling - and actually sees a flash of Charlie doing the same thing with the whole "Not Penny's Boat" drowning incident on the Island.
At the hospital, Desmond is given an MRI, and sees flashes of memories that... well... didn't happen for him but happened for the Other Desmond. He sees Penny and his son and all that.
Mrs. Widmore is Eloise, and she's as strange and cryptic as ever. My man Daniel Faraday - hells yes! - is Daniel Widmore now - the offspring of Eloise and Charles. He wasn't before, right? He was just Eloise's son, at least that's the only parent we knew. Anyway, he approaches Desmond and shows him some crazy physics equations he recently wrote - only this Daniel is a musician, not a physicist. He asks Desmond, "What if this wasn't supposed to be our life? What if we had some other life and for some reason we changed things?" He must smoke a lot of weed as a musician. Desmond and Daniel discuss their weird déjà vu feelings related to their respective chicks. Daniel tells Desmond that Penny is his half-sister, and where to find her. They meet, and it's adorable, and I remember how much I love Desmond and Penny.
At that moment, we're taken back to the Island, where Desmond has survived his electromagnetic event. He has apparently had those flash-sideways as memories, and now he's all-in on helping Widmore on the Island.
As Desmond's walking through the jungle with Widmore's people, Sayid ambushes them and tells Desmond to follow him.
30 March 2010
Lost
Island Jin is in the jungle camp with Smokey Locke's crew. I love the nighttime jungle scenes on this show. Everyone is taken out with paralyzing darts by that Liz Lemon chick, and her goons nab Jin.
Smokey Locke finds Sun and tells her he knows where Jin is, but she doesn't fall for his smokey BS. As she's running from him, she runs into a tree and suddenly can only speak Korean. Wow, this is some soap opera-quality stuff here.
Locke comes back to his jungle camp to find that everyone's all tranquilized and stuff. He's bitter that Jin's missing. He heads over to Hydra Island and meets up with Charles Widmore. They kind of face off but do nothing. Next thing you know, Charles is with Jin showing him pictures of his daughter. Hey - Charles Widmore stole Sun's camera! Bastard! He tells Jin that Locke can't leave the Island or everyone ceases to exist. Mmm-kay.
Non-Island Jin and Sun aren't married, but they're still banging (and I bet she's pregnant). Jin's in the US to deliver money for her father, but the money is confiscated at the airport.
That Kickass Bad Dude (You know the one. Yep, that one.) shows up for the money. Turns out Sun's father was paying that dude to kill Jin (cardinal sin to bang the boss's daughter). Kickass Bad Dude nabs Jin and we're back where we were in the Sayid episode - he's got Jin tied to a chair in a restaurant refrigerator. After Sayid kills the dudes he gives Jin a boxcutter to free himself and then Jun ambushes the guy bringing back Sun. He shoots him in the eye (nice!), and Sun is shot as well. And also - yep - she's pregnant. Sometimes Lost is so damn obvious I finish the dialogue out loud. Sometimes it does crazy stuff. I think I prefer the crazy stuff.
This episode bored me to tears. How sad. It simultaneously dragged and jumped around way too much. One second Locke was with his group, the next he was with the other, the next he was on Hydra. Oy. The only relief was found through Ben, Sawyer, and Miles, per usual.
The end gave me some hope, though, as we see Desmond is with the Widmore crew, apparently against his will. Desmond! Penneh!
Smokey Locke finds Sun and tells her he knows where Jin is, but she doesn't fall for his smokey BS. As she's running from him, she runs into a tree and suddenly can only speak Korean. Wow, this is some soap opera-quality stuff here.
Locke comes back to his jungle camp to find that everyone's all tranquilized and stuff. He's bitter that Jin's missing. He heads over to Hydra Island and meets up with Charles Widmore. They kind of face off but do nothing. Next thing you know, Charles is with Jin showing him pictures of his daughter. Hey - Charles Widmore stole Sun's camera! Bastard! He tells Jin that Locke can't leave the Island or everyone ceases to exist. Mmm-kay.
Non-Island Jin and Sun aren't married, but they're still banging (and I bet she's pregnant). Jin's in the US to deliver money for her father, but the money is confiscated at the airport.
That Kickass Bad Dude (You know the one. Yep, that one.) shows up for the money. Turns out Sun's father was paying that dude to kill Jin (cardinal sin to bang the boss's daughter). Kickass Bad Dude nabs Jin and we're back where we were in the Sayid episode - he's got Jin tied to a chair in a restaurant refrigerator. After Sayid kills the dudes he gives Jin a boxcutter to free himself and then Jun ambushes the guy bringing back Sun. He shoots him in the eye (nice!), and Sun is shot as well. And also - yep - she's pregnant. Sometimes Lost is so damn obvious I finish the dialogue out loud. Sometimes it does crazy stuff. I think I prefer the crazy stuff.
This episode bored me to tears. How sad. It simultaneously dragged and jumped around way too much. One second Locke was with his group, the next he was with the other, the next he was on Hydra. Oy. The only relief was found through Ben, Sawyer, and Miles, per usual.
The end gave me some hope, though, as we see Desmond is with the Widmore crew, apparently against his will. Desmond! Penneh!
23 March 2010
Lost
We get some old-fashioned flashbacks (in fact, this episode's practically one big flashback) since we're getting Richard's story tonight -- and Richard's been the same age since 1867. Back in 1867, Richard's wife was very sick. He went to see an a-hole doctor, and when Dr. A. Hole wouldn't help him, he struggled with him and accidentally killed him. By the time he made it home, his wife was dead, and he was arrested.
Richard is set to be hanged, but is instead sold as a slave and put on the Black Rock (property of Capt. Hanso). The ship wrecks on the Island and Smokey attacks, killing everyone but Richard. Richard can't get loose from his chains, until eventually The Man in Black (does he have a name? The Original Smoke Monster?) comes to him. Richard had a vision that his dead wife was alive and on the Island, and says he'll do anything for Original Smokey if he helps him save her.
O.S. sends Richard to kill "the devil" in the statue, who has his wife. "The devil" is of course Jacob, who fends off Richard and then has a lovely conversation with him. Jacob brought the Black Rock to the Island because the Island contains an evil that must be kept on the Island. Jacob hires Richard on as his liaison to those brought to the Island, and in exchange Richard will live forever.
We see present-day Richard at the beginning and end of the episode, and he has no idea what to do with himself since everything Jacob ever said was a lie. He's gone a bit crazy, poor thing. He heads out into the jungle and announces to the air that he's changed his mind. Hurley comes by and tells Richard he's spoken with Richard's dead wife. She's standing right next to him. They do the whole Ghost thing and she tells him not to feel guilty for her death, that he's suffered enough. Her final message for Richard: Stop The Man in Black (Locke) from leaving the Island, or else you all go to hell.
Richard is set to be hanged, but is instead sold as a slave and put on the Black Rock (property of Capt. Hanso). The ship wrecks on the Island and Smokey attacks, killing everyone but Richard. Richard can't get loose from his chains, until eventually The Man in Black (does he have a name? The Original Smoke Monster?) comes to him. Richard had a vision that his dead wife was alive and on the Island, and says he'll do anything for Original Smokey if he helps him save her.
O.S. sends Richard to kill "the devil" in the statue, who has his wife. "The devil" is of course Jacob, who fends off Richard and then has a lovely conversation with him. Jacob brought the Black Rock to the Island because the Island contains an evil that must be kept on the Island. Jacob hires Richard on as his liaison to those brought to the Island, and in exchange Richard will live forever.
We see present-day Richard at the beginning and end of the episode, and he has no idea what to do with himself since everything Jacob ever said was a lie. He's gone a bit crazy, poor thing. He heads out into the jungle and announces to the air that he's changed his mind. Hurley comes by and tells Richard he's spoken with Richard's dead wife. She's standing right next to him. They do the whole Ghost thing and she tells him not to feel guilty for her death, that he's suffered enough. Her final message for Richard: Stop The Man in Black (Locke) from leaving the Island, or else you all go to hell.
16 March 2010
Lost
Island. Locke's crew (Sawyer, Sayid, Jin, Kate, Claire, and a handful of nobodies) rally together on the beach. Locke sends Sawyer out on a mission to go to Hydra Island to do recon of the Ajira crash site.
Near the plane, bodies are laid out together. He finds one survivor, whom I'll call Liz Lemon, because she has glasses and brown hair. She says one day she heard screaming and found everyone else dead. But Liz Lemon turns out to be a liar, and actually has 3 dudes with her with guns. They take Sawyer to a submarine - turns out they're part of Widmore's crew.
Widmore claims he didn't murder the crash survivors. Sawyer makes a deal - I'll bring Locke over here, tell him the coast is clear, then you can kill him. In exchange? Get me and my peoples out of here.
Sawyer heads back to the Island and tells Locks that Widmore's there, setting up ways to keep out the Smoke Monster. He also tells Locke that he told Widmore he was setting Locke up. That's like a triple-cross, and Sawyer sure is trusting that Locke's the one to help him here. Really, he plans to let Locke and Widmore fight it out so that he and Kate can get away in the sub while they're distracted. How is a sub any easier to pilot than a plane?
Claire wigs out and tries to kill Kate for taking Aaron. Locke handles his bitches though, and slaps Claire in the face! He also shares with Kate that he has mommy issues. Well who doesn't on this show?
Non-Island. Non-Island Sawyer is still running cons, but undercover -- as a cop! Hell yeah I like Sawyer as a cop. Not only that, but Miles is his partner. FINALLY AN INSPIRED FLASH-SIDEWAYS!!! Can I please have a spinoff show of them in a buddy comedy? PLEASE!?
Miles sets Sawyer up on a date with Not-Dead Non-Island Charlotte. They do it, because Sawyer is still the ladies' man. He quickly kicks her out of bed once she's a little too nosy about his past. Seems this Sawyer still witnessed his parents' murder-suicide, but became a cop instead of a criminal -- but still wants revenge and seeks the man responsible.
Later, when Sawyer and Miles are in the car, Kate slams into them. Sawyer chases her down.
Non-Island Sawyer also watches Little House on the Prairie at night. I'm really not sure what to make of that.
Near the plane, bodies are laid out together. He finds one survivor, whom I'll call Liz Lemon, because she has glasses and brown hair. She says one day she heard screaming and found everyone else dead. But Liz Lemon turns out to be a liar, and actually has 3 dudes with her with guns. They take Sawyer to a submarine - turns out they're part of Widmore's crew.
Widmore claims he didn't murder the crash survivors. Sawyer makes a deal - I'll bring Locke over here, tell him the coast is clear, then you can kill him. In exchange? Get me and my peoples out of here.
Sawyer heads back to the Island and tells Locks that Widmore's there, setting up ways to keep out the Smoke Monster. He also tells Locke that he told Widmore he was setting Locke up. That's like a triple-cross, and Sawyer sure is trusting that Locke's the one to help him here. Really, he plans to let Locke and Widmore fight it out so that he and Kate can get away in the sub while they're distracted. How is a sub any easier to pilot than a plane?
Claire wigs out and tries to kill Kate for taking Aaron. Locke handles his bitches though, and slaps Claire in the face! He also shares with Kate that he has mommy issues. Well who doesn't on this show?
Non-Island. Non-Island Sawyer is still running cons, but undercover -- as a cop! Hell yeah I like Sawyer as a cop. Not only that, but Miles is his partner. FINALLY AN INSPIRED FLASH-SIDEWAYS!!! Can I please have a spinoff show of them in a buddy comedy? PLEASE!?
Miles sets Sawyer up on a date with Not-Dead Non-Island Charlotte. They do it, because Sawyer is still the ladies' man. He quickly kicks her out of bed once she's a little too nosy about his past. Seems this Sawyer still witnessed his parents' murder-suicide, but became a cop instead of a criminal -- but still wants revenge and seeks the man responsible.
Later, when Sawyer and Miles are in the car, Kate slams into them. Sawyer chases her down.
Non-Island Sawyer also watches Little House on the Prairie at night. I'm really not sure what to make of that.
09 March 2010
Lost
We open with Island Ben running away from Smokey's Temple Massacre. He runs into Miles, Frank, Sun, and That Chick. That Chick hands Jacob's ashes over to Miles, and it's enough for him to pick up on something -- that Ben killed Jacob. This pisses off That Chick and she makes Ben dig his own grave.
Locke shows up and asks what Ben's doing. Gotta love his Classic Ben delivery of: "I'm digging my own grave." Locke helps him escape and tells him to meet him on the Other Island, the Hydra Station. Ben has a tearful moment with That Chick where he apologizes and says he understands because he watched his daughter Alex die. She decides all is cool and says Ben can come with her instead of Locke.
Ben chooses to stay on the Island with That Chick and the Gang.
Non-Island Ben is teaching history and has a bad haircut. Arzt is a teacher there too, natch. And Locke, who you'll recall is substitute teaching, encourages Ben to lead an uprising against the Principal he hates. Ben is also taking care of his sick father. His dad informs the audience that they signed up for the Dharma Initiative, went to The Island, but didn't stay.
Alex is here too, but she's not Ben's daughter, she's a student. A student who knows his home address and shows up to it. CREEPY. While they're studying, Alex tells Ben how she once caught the Principal and the School Nurse doing it. CREEPIER. Ben asks Arzt to hack into the Nurse's email account. Even though Arzt is a chemistry teacher. Sure, I'll go with it - science nerds can do everything.
So Ben lucks into sexy emails and blackmails the Principal with them. He tells him to resign and recommend Ben as his replacement. The Principal counters: if you make me quit, then I will ruin Alex's future and not recommend her to Yale. Wow, this Principal is a real asshole. Seriously. Dick.
Ben chooses his life of misery as a history teacher, but at least Alex is happy.
Also on the Island, Hurley and Jack meet up with Richard in the jungle. He tells them everyone in the Temple is dead and he leads them to the Black Rock ship. (Richard is actually from that ship.) Richard wants to die because his life has no purpose without Jacob. He can't kill himself, so wants Jack to kill him for him. Jack lights a fuse on the ship's dynamite stash for Richard, and then sits down to talk. Jack's betting that he's protected as well, that Jacob brought him here for a reason and that he won't blow up. I find myself begging begging begging that the dynamite goes off. I mean, that would be both unexpected and the Greatest Thing To Happen To Jack. Tragically, Jack was right. Of course he was. He and Richard ain't goin' nowhere.
At the end, they all head to the beach, and Sun reunites with Hurley and Jack. We see a periscope rising up from the ocean. There's a submarine. Piloted by Charles Widmore.
Locke shows up and asks what Ben's doing. Gotta love his Classic Ben delivery of: "I'm digging my own grave." Locke helps him escape and tells him to meet him on the Other Island, the Hydra Station. Ben has a tearful moment with That Chick where he apologizes and says he understands because he watched his daughter Alex die. She decides all is cool and says Ben can come with her instead of Locke.
Ben chooses to stay on the Island with That Chick and the Gang.
Non-Island Ben is teaching history and has a bad haircut. Arzt is a teacher there too, natch. And Locke, who you'll recall is substitute teaching, encourages Ben to lead an uprising against the Principal he hates. Ben is also taking care of his sick father. His dad informs the audience that they signed up for the Dharma Initiative, went to The Island, but didn't stay.
Alex is here too, but she's not Ben's daughter, she's a student. A student who knows his home address and shows up to it. CREEPY. While they're studying, Alex tells Ben how she once caught the Principal and the School Nurse doing it. CREEPIER. Ben asks Arzt to hack into the Nurse's email account. Even though Arzt is a chemistry teacher. Sure, I'll go with it - science nerds can do everything.
So Ben lucks into sexy emails and blackmails the Principal with them. He tells him to resign and recommend Ben as his replacement. The Principal counters: if you make me quit, then I will ruin Alex's future and not recommend her to Yale. Wow, this Principal is a real asshole. Seriously. Dick.
Ben chooses his life of misery as a history teacher, but at least Alex is happy.
Also on the Island, Hurley and Jack meet up with Richard in the jungle. He tells them everyone in the Temple is dead and he leads them to the Black Rock ship. (Richard is actually from that ship.) Richard wants to die because his life has no purpose without Jacob. He can't kill himself, so wants Jack to kill him for him. Jack lights a fuse on the ship's dynamite stash for Richard, and then sits down to talk. Jack's betting that he's protected as well, that Jacob brought him here for a reason and that he won't blow up. I find myself begging begging begging that the dynamite goes off. I mean, that would be both unexpected and the Greatest Thing To Happen To Jack. Tragically, Jack was right. Of course he was. He and Richard ain't goin' nowhere.
At the end, they all head to the beach, and Sun reunites with Hurley and Jack. We see a periscope rising up from the ocean. There's a submarine. Piloted by Charles Widmore.
02 March 2010
Lost: Sayid Loves To Kill People
Non-Island Sayid meets up with Nadia, but this Nadia is married to his brother and they have kids. Dagger. Sayid's brother owes some people money, and wants Sayid to get all Iraqi Torturer on their asses to get them to back off. He doesn't, and his brother gets the beatdown. Sayid ends up killing the guys, and he also finds Jin tied up in their hideout. Right before Sayid opened the door, I totally knew it was going to be someone we knew. Seriously, this whole connectivity thing is getting cutesy.
Shout-out to the costume designers this season - Island Sayid is looking fine in his black tank top and pants. It's very sleek and looks like a catsuit. Sayid and Japanese Dude have an Epic Fight, but Japanese Dude stops just short of killing him -- when he sees a baseball roll off the table. Ooookay.
Smokey!Locke sends Claire into the Temple, and she tells Japanese Dude that Locke wants to see him. He refuses, and instead throws her in the hole and instructs Sayid to kill Locke.
Sayid ventures out into the jungle and encounters Locke. Sayid stabs him in the heart, but Locke pulls out the knife and gives it back to Sayid. Turns out, Japanese Dude knew Locke wouldn't die, and was instead hoping Locke would immediately kill Sayid. Locke sends Sayid back to the Temple with a message of his own: "There's a dude out in the jungle who wants to leave the Island. Either join him by sundown or DIE!"
The baseball turns out to relate to a son Japanese Dude had, a son he killed in a drunk driving accident. He came to the Island after being visited by Jacob, who told him his son could come back to life if Japanese Dude would move to the Island and be his bitch. Sayid is apparently not moved by this story, because he throws Japanese Dude down and drowns him. R.I.P. Japanese Dude.
Once Japanese Dude is dead, the Temple is unprotected. Smokey comes to visit and starts killing people left and right. Ben and his gang show up, and Ben can clearly tell something's off with Sayid. Once Smokey's done with his rampage, Claire, Sayid, and a bunch of randoms meet Locke outside of the Temple. So I guess "It's on?"
Shout-out to the costume designers this season - Island Sayid is looking fine in his black tank top and pants. It's very sleek and looks like a catsuit. Sayid and Japanese Dude have an Epic Fight, but Japanese Dude stops just short of killing him -- when he sees a baseball roll off the table. Ooookay.
Smokey!Locke sends Claire into the Temple, and she tells Japanese Dude that Locke wants to see him. He refuses, and instead throws her in the hole and instructs Sayid to kill Locke.
Sayid ventures out into the jungle and encounters Locke. Sayid stabs him in the heart, but Locke pulls out the knife and gives it back to Sayid. Turns out, Japanese Dude knew Locke wouldn't die, and was instead hoping Locke would immediately kill Sayid. Locke sends Sayid back to the Temple with a message of his own: "There's a dude out in the jungle who wants to leave the Island. Either join him by sundown or DIE!"
The baseball turns out to relate to a son Japanese Dude had, a son he killed in a drunk driving accident. He came to the Island after being visited by Jacob, who told him his son could come back to life if Japanese Dude would move to the Island and be his bitch. Sayid is apparently not moved by this story, because he throws Japanese Dude down and drowns him. R.I.P. Japanese Dude.
Once Japanese Dude is dead, the Temple is unprotected. Smokey comes to visit and starts killing people left and right. Ben and his gang show up, and Ben can clearly tell something's off with Sayid. Once Smokey's done with his rampage, Claire, Sayid, and a bunch of randoms meet Locke outside of the Temple. So I guess "It's on?"
24 February 2010
Lost
My digital cable kept pixelating last night. Pixelation does not lead to conducive Lost viewing. Lots can happen in the 5 seconds the sounds drop out or the video jumps. So I gave up early and watched it on Hulu tonight. And I was pretty disappointed. Not that I expect a lot from a Jack episode.
Non-Island Jack notices his appendix scar, for the first time apparently. I know this scar has appeared and disappeared at different times, so that's semi-significant. He also has a kid -- a sullen, douchey kid. Yep, must be his. His kid auditions for a music conservatory. The Japanese Temple Guy has a kid auditioning too. The end. DULL!
Things aren't much more exciting on the Island. Jacob appears to Hurley in the Temple and gives him directions for him and Jack to follow. They end up at a lighthouse, the latest in a series of new buildings on the Island. Jack sees a reflection of his childhood home in the mirror and promptly acts like his usual dick self, pitching a fit and destroying the mirrors.
Jacob tells Hurley that all he really needed was to get them away from the Temple because someone's about to go on a rampage there. Also, he needed to put Jack on a path of staring at the ocean to determine his destiny. Why can't you put Jack on a path to jumping into the ocean, Jacob?
Meanwhile, Dirty Claire has been on her own for 3 years. She lives in a handmade nuthouse, complete with a "baby" made of an animal skull and god knows what else. She's been looking for her baby this whole time and is convinced the Temple Others have him. Jin tells her Kate has been raising him, but after she gets all stabby against an Other with an axe, he tells her that Aaron is at the Temple and he will take her to him. She's all, "Good, because if Kate had really raised Aaron, I'd kill her."
Non-Island Jack notices his appendix scar, for the first time apparently. I know this scar has appeared and disappeared at different times, so that's semi-significant. He also has a kid -- a sullen, douchey kid. Yep, must be his. His kid auditions for a music conservatory. The Japanese Temple Guy has a kid auditioning too. The end. DULL!
Things aren't much more exciting on the Island. Jacob appears to Hurley in the Temple and gives him directions for him and Jack to follow. They end up at a lighthouse, the latest in a series of new buildings on the Island. Jack sees a reflection of his childhood home in the mirror and promptly acts like his usual dick self, pitching a fit and destroying the mirrors.
Jacob tells Hurley that all he really needed was to get them away from the Temple because someone's about to go on a rampage there. Also, he needed to put Jack on a path of staring at the ocean to determine his destiny. Why can't you put Jack on a path to jumping into the ocean, Jacob?
Meanwhile, Dirty Claire has been on her own for 3 years. She lives in a handmade nuthouse, complete with a "baby" made of an animal skull and god knows what else. She's been looking for her baby this whole time and is convinced the Temple Others have him. Jin tells her Kate has been raising him, but after she gets all stabby against an Other with an axe, he tells her that Aaron is at the Temple and he will take her to him. She's all, "Good, because if Kate had really raised Aaron, I'd kill her."
17 February 2010
Lost
I thought this episode had both a lot going on and nothing at all. It's probably going to be one of those episodes that makes more sense later on, but for now it felt bloated with a lot of "gotcha!" moments.
To whit (for Non-Island Locke):
-- He gets fired from his job, but then he runs into Hurley -- because he owns Locke's company!!
-- Hurley passes on the phone number of the temp agency he owns -- and Rose happens to work there!!
-- Locke works as a substitute teacher -- where Ben is a history teacher!!
I mean, this whole people-from-the-Island-are-still-linked thing is already getting old. I get it. They're linked.
Meanwhile, on the Island, Smokey!Locke is "recruiting" - he has Richard strung up in a tree and seeks out a dirty, drunken, grieving Sawyer.
Then we have our standard unexplained Island-y moments:
-- Locke sees a kid standing in the jungle with blood on his hands. Later, when he's with Sawyer, they both see the kid and Locke chases after him. The kid says to Locke: "You know the rules. You can't kill him." Locke's all, "Don't tell me what I can't do" and the kid stomps off. Mmm-kay.
-- Sawyer knows that Locke isn't Locke, but is curious as to how this will play out. Locke takes him to a cave where there are scales balanced with a black rock on one side and a white rock on the other. Locke picks up the white rock (which symbolizes Jacob) and throws it into the ocean. Mmm-kay.
-- The last names of our Oceanic passengers are written on the ceiling of the cave. And some have numbers next to them. And some are crossed out. Locke says Jacob wrote the names, and that he pushed everyone onto the Island because they were "candidates" - to be the new Jacob and protect the Island. But Locke says it doesn't need protecting and they should just leave the Island. "You ready, James?" Sawyer: "Hell yes." Mmm-kay.
In Real-Locke news, Ben, Sun, Frank, and That Other Chick bury the real Locke's body just off the beach. Ben gives the eulogy, including, "I'm very sorry I murdered him." El. Oh. El.
To whit (for Non-Island Locke):
-- He gets fired from his job, but then he runs into Hurley -- because he owns Locke's company!!
-- Hurley passes on the phone number of the temp agency he owns -- and Rose happens to work there!!
-- Locke works as a substitute teacher -- where Ben is a history teacher!!
I mean, this whole people-from-the-Island-are-still-linked thing is already getting old. I get it. They're linked.
Meanwhile, on the Island, Smokey!Locke is "recruiting" - he has Richard strung up in a tree and seeks out a dirty, drunken, grieving Sawyer.
Then we have our standard unexplained Island-y moments:
-- Locke sees a kid standing in the jungle with blood on his hands. Later, when he's with Sawyer, they both see the kid and Locke chases after him. The kid says to Locke: "You know the rules. You can't kill him." Locke's all, "Don't tell me what I can't do" and the kid stomps off. Mmm-kay.
-- Sawyer knows that Locke isn't Locke, but is curious as to how this will play out. Locke takes him to a cave where there are scales balanced with a black rock on one side and a white rock on the other. Locke picks up the white rock (which symbolizes Jacob) and throws it into the ocean. Mmm-kay.
-- The last names of our Oceanic passengers are written on the ceiling of the cave. And some have numbers next to them. And some are crossed out. Locke says Jacob wrote the names, and that he pushed everyone onto the Island because they were "candidates" - to be the new Jacob and protect the Island. But Locke says it doesn't need protecting and they should just leave the Island. "You ready, James?" Sawyer: "Hell yes." Mmm-kay.
In Real-Locke news, Ben, Sun, Frank, and That Other Chick bury the real Locke's body just off the beach. Ben gives the eulogy, including, "I'm very sorry I murdered him." El. Oh. El.
09 February 2010
Lost
Island. Sayid comes back to life. 10 bucks says he's really Jacob. And you gotta love Hurley asking Sayid if he's a zombie.
Japanese Dude tells Jack he has to get Sayid to take a pill to ward off the "infection." When he won't say what's in the pill, Jack tries to take it, but Japanese Dude stops him - because the pill contains poison.
Japanese Dude says that Sayid has been "claimed" - that something dark has possession of his body and is trying to take over him. He also says this same thing happened to Claire.
Sawyer's had enough and leaves the Temple. The Temple Others say he has to come back, and Kate and Jin set off after him. They're separated and Jin is rescued... by Claire. Claire with nappy hair.
Can I just say how pissed I am that Juliet is gone? Because Sawyer loved her so damn much and they were great together and they lived together for however many years in that damned Dharma Initiative. He was going to ask her to marry him. And now he's all sad and depressed. Boo.
And now it's time for some flash-sideways.
Non-Island. Kate is fleeing the airport in a taxi. She lets pregnant Claire out and takes off. When she goes through Claire's bags and realizes she's pregnant, Kate drives back to get her. Claire's on the way to meet with the couple who's going to adopt her baby, and Kate drives her there.
When they arrive, they find out that the couple has split and is no longer interested in the baby. Does Claire have a Return Policy? She starts going into labor, and Kate (Claire's Personal Taxi Service, apparently) takes her to the hospital. That evil Ethan dude is the doctor.
They hold off the labor for a bit, and Claire gives Kate her credit card, because she's nice and naïve/dumb like that. Claire should've saved it to buy shampoo for the island. She could probably use some toothpaste too.
Japanese Dude tells Jack he has to get Sayid to take a pill to ward off the "infection." When he won't say what's in the pill, Jack tries to take it, but Japanese Dude stops him - because the pill contains poison.
Japanese Dude says that Sayid has been "claimed" - that something dark has possession of his body and is trying to take over him. He also says this same thing happened to Claire.
Sawyer's had enough and leaves the Temple. The Temple Others say he has to come back, and Kate and Jin set off after him. They're separated and Jin is rescued... by Claire. Claire with nappy hair.
Can I just say how pissed I am that Juliet is gone? Because Sawyer loved her so damn much and they were great together and they lived together for however many years in that damned Dharma Initiative. He was going to ask her to marry him. And now he's all sad and depressed. Boo.
And now it's time for some flash-sideways.
Non-Island. Kate is fleeing the airport in a taxi. She lets pregnant Claire out and takes off. When she goes through Claire's bags and realizes she's pregnant, Kate drives back to get her. Claire's on the way to meet with the couple who's going to adopt her baby, and Kate drives her there.
When they arrive, they find out that the couple has split and is no longer interested in the baby. Does Claire have a Return Policy? She starts going into labor, and Kate (Claire's Personal Taxi Service, apparently) takes her to the hospital. That evil Ethan dude is the doctor.
They hold off the labor for a bit, and Claire gives Kate her credit card, because she's nice and naïve/dumb like that. Claire should've saved it to buy shampoo for the island. She could probably use some toothpaste too.
02 February 2010
Lost Returns: Hour Two
Island. Sawyer gets to work burying Juliet with Miles, while everyone else takes Sayid to the Temple.
LAX. Jack is told that there's been a mix-up with his father's coffin - it was never put on the plane. In fact, they don't know where it is.
Temple. Our people are captured by The Others Part Deux - some vaguely cult-looking types hanging out in the Temple.
LAX. Kate asks the U.S. Marshal to let her use the bathroom. While in there, she tries to break out of her handcuffs and isn't successful, but is still able to knock out the Marshal. Damn, but Kate is a badass chick. She escapes into an elevator with Sawyer.
Juliet's Grave. Sawyer asks Miles to talk to Juliet (oh yeah, Miles is awesome and he can speak to ghosts) and find out what she wanted to tell him. The answer? "It worked." Too bad that's not helpful. Thanks a lot, Ghost of Juliet.
Temple. Cindy the Stewardess is among the cult. When Hurley says that Jacob sent them, the leader (who speaks what I can only assume is un-subtitled Japanese) is intrigued. Hurley offers him the guitar case Jacob had given him - and inside is a big symbol - the symbol that was held by the four-toed statue. Japanese Cult Leader cracks it open to find a piece of paper inside. He says the paper says "If [Sayid] dies we're all in a lot of trouble."
LAX. Customs holds Jin when they find a Rolex and large amounts of cash in his possession which he didn't declare.
Crazy Cult Ceremony. There's some blood involved, and a large pool of water, and an hourglass. The cult forcibly drowns Sayid until he is dead. I kept expecting him to come back to life - and Jack even tried to resuscitate him - but no dice. R.I.P. Sayid? Say it ain't so!
LAX. Kate's running around the airport with her handcuffs covered. She makes it outside, behind Hurley in the taxi line. Just as the Marshal sees her, she runs into a cab - and sits next to Claire.
Temple. Sawyer and Miles have been nabbed by the Cult, and join everyone else at Sayid's side. The Cult Leader, meanwhile, talks to Hurley about Jacob, and learns he is dead. When he hears about this, everyone starts freaking out. They set off fireworks (as a warning, I presume) and start fortifying the Temple to "keep him out."
"Him" being Smokey being "Locke", who tells Ben that he wants to "go home."
LAX. Jack's trying to sort out his lost coffin, while Locke is there sorting out a lost bag full o' knives. Locke offers Jack some comfort, and Jack tells him he's a spinal surgeon and gives him his card.
Beach. Smokey!Locke comes out and punches Richard in the face, carrying him down the beach past Dead!Locke's body.
Temple. Sayid sits up.
OH SNAP! This stuff is definitely giving me a headache, and yet I love every damn second.
LAX. Jack is told that there's been a mix-up with his father's coffin - it was never put on the plane. In fact, they don't know where it is.
Temple. Our people are captured by The Others Part Deux - some vaguely cult-looking types hanging out in the Temple.
LAX. Kate asks the U.S. Marshal to let her use the bathroom. While in there, she tries to break out of her handcuffs and isn't successful, but is still able to knock out the Marshal. Damn, but Kate is a badass chick. She escapes into an elevator with Sawyer.
Juliet's Grave. Sawyer asks Miles to talk to Juliet (oh yeah, Miles is awesome and he can speak to ghosts) and find out what she wanted to tell him. The answer? "It worked." Too bad that's not helpful. Thanks a lot, Ghost of Juliet.
Temple. Cindy the Stewardess is among the cult. When Hurley says that Jacob sent them, the leader (who speaks what I can only assume is un-subtitled Japanese) is intrigued. Hurley offers him the guitar case Jacob had given him - and inside is a big symbol - the symbol that was held by the four-toed statue. Japanese Cult Leader cracks it open to find a piece of paper inside. He says the paper says "If [Sayid] dies we're all in a lot of trouble."
LAX. Customs holds Jin when they find a Rolex and large amounts of cash in his possession which he didn't declare.
Crazy Cult Ceremony. There's some blood involved, and a large pool of water, and an hourglass. The cult forcibly drowns Sayid until he is dead. I kept expecting him to come back to life - and Jack even tried to resuscitate him - but no dice. R.I.P. Sayid? Say it ain't so!
LAX. Kate's running around the airport with her handcuffs covered. She makes it outside, behind Hurley in the taxi line. Just as the Marshal sees her, she runs into a cab - and sits next to Claire.
Temple. Sawyer and Miles have been nabbed by the Cult, and join everyone else at Sayid's side. The Cult Leader, meanwhile, talks to Hurley about Jacob, and learns he is dead. When he hears about this, everyone starts freaking out. They set off fireworks (as a warning, I presume) and start fortifying the Temple to "keep him out."
"Him" being Smokey being "Locke", who tells Ben that he wants to "go home."
LAX. Jack's trying to sort out his lost coffin, while Locke is there sorting out a lost bag full o' knives. Locke offers Jack some comfort, and Jack tells him he's a spinal surgeon and gives him his card.
Beach. Smokey!Locke comes out and punches Richard in the face, carrying him down the beach past Dead!Locke's body.
Temple. Sayid sits up.
OH SNAP! This stuff is definitely giving me a headache, and yet I love every damn second.
Lost Returns: Hour One
I can't believe I'm staying up until 11 PM, but it's only because this show's been off the air so damn long, and I don't want to be spoiled. Better be good!
I watched the recap hour first because goddamn but I can't remember what happened yesterday let alone nearly a year ago on a confusing-ass show about time travel. I was so glad I watched it because it reminded me how good it was last year too.
Last we left the Island, a big bomb went off, with the goal of resetting time and getting everyone out of 1970-something. We open with everyone back on Oceanic Flight 815. But instead of crashing, they get some pretty standard turbulence. And also Desmond is on the plane, not down on the Island pressing the button. Jack seems aware that something's different - like he's getting déjà vu. And then we get our first view of the Island - totally under water, on the oceanic floor. Oh. Snap.
Next, Kate wakes up in a tree, looking the same as she did before, ears ringing from the bomb. Miles is with her. They're on the Island. And then OMFG Jack is there too!!!! OK, so now there are going to be 2 simultaneous and overlapping timelines!? I'm gonna have a stroke. Sawyer's there too, and pissed because Juliet's dead and the bomb didn't work.
Back to the Plane. Where everyone is - Sawyer, that science teacher dude, Kate in handcuffs, Hurley... again with the duplication because...
Back on the Island. Hurley is with a bleeding-out Sayid when Jacob shows up. Meanwhile, Jin meets up with Sawyer et al and they hear Juliet calling from the bottom of the pit she fell into.
Plane. We're back to old-fashioned dickhead Jin. And then Boone! BOONE!
Island. Locke is wiping Jacob's blood off of his knife. Ben walks to the beach and is shown Locke's body.
Other Side of the Island. Jacob tells Hurley that he died an hour ago. Hurley is very unfazed by this, all, "Sorry, dude." I suppose he's seen it all at this point. Jacob tells him to take Sayid to the Temple so he can be saved.
Plane. Charlie isn't breathing, and Jack and Sayid save him. He's choked on a balloon of heroin, the idiot.
Island. Everyone clears the rubble from the pit, and Sawyer makes his way down to the bottom. Juliet's alive, but can't be in good shape - that was a long-ass fall.
At the Beach. Everyone heads into the base of the statue looking for Jacob. Locke or "Locke" or whoever this is tells everyone that Jacob's dead. Jacob's bodyguards start shooting at him, and then "Locke" disappears, the Smoke Monster arriving in his place. Smokey kicks everyone's ass and leaves. Ben survives, and Locke comes back all, "I'm sorry they had to see me like that." So Locke or "Locke" is the Smoke Monster.
Island. I love Sawyer and Juliet so much. They're awesome. Juliet tells him she has something important to tell him, and then dies. R.I.P. Juliet. Now I feel the pain all over again. And Sawyer will have his revenge! Jack is a dead man!!!
Plane. The plane lands safely at LAX. I suppose it's worth noting at this point that Jack doesn't know where Desmond is, and we don't see him on the plane either.
I watched the recap hour first because goddamn but I can't remember what happened yesterday let alone nearly a year ago on a confusing-ass show about time travel. I was so glad I watched it because it reminded me how good it was last year too.
Last we left the Island, a big bomb went off, with the goal of resetting time and getting everyone out of 1970-something. We open with everyone back on Oceanic Flight 815. But instead of crashing, they get some pretty standard turbulence. And also Desmond is on the plane, not down on the Island pressing the button. Jack seems aware that something's different - like he's getting déjà vu. And then we get our first view of the Island - totally under water, on the oceanic floor. Oh. Snap.
Next, Kate wakes up in a tree, looking the same as she did before, ears ringing from the bomb. Miles is with her. They're on the Island. And then OMFG Jack is there too!!!! OK, so now there are going to be 2 simultaneous and overlapping timelines!? I'm gonna have a stroke. Sawyer's there too, and pissed because Juliet's dead and the bomb didn't work.
Back to the Plane. Where everyone is - Sawyer, that science teacher dude, Kate in handcuffs, Hurley... again with the duplication because...
Back on the Island. Hurley is with a bleeding-out Sayid when Jacob shows up. Meanwhile, Jin meets up with Sawyer et al and they hear Juliet calling from the bottom of the pit she fell into.
Plane. We're back to old-fashioned dickhead Jin. And then Boone! BOONE!
Island. Locke is wiping Jacob's blood off of his knife. Ben walks to the beach and is shown Locke's body.
Other Side of the Island. Jacob tells Hurley that he died an hour ago. Hurley is very unfazed by this, all, "Sorry, dude." I suppose he's seen it all at this point. Jacob tells him to take Sayid to the Temple so he can be saved.
Plane. Charlie isn't breathing, and Jack and Sayid save him. He's choked on a balloon of heroin, the idiot.
Island. Everyone clears the rubble from the pit, and Sawyer makes his way down to the bottom. Juliet's alive, but can't be in good shape - that was a long-ass fall.
At the Beach. Everyone heads into the base of the statue looking for Jacob. Locke or "Locke" or whoever this is tells everyone that Jacob's dead. Jacob's bodyguards start shooting at him, and then "Locke" disappears, the Smoke Monster arriving in his place. Smokey kicks everyone's ass and leaves. Ben survives, and Locke comes back all, "I'm sorry they had to see me like that." So Locke or "Locke" is the Smoke Monster.
Island. I love Sawyer and Juliet so much. They're awesome. Juliet tells him she has something important to tell him, and then dies. R.I.P. Juliet. Now I feel the pain all over again. And Sawyer will have his revenge! Jack is a dead man!!!
Plane. The plane lands safely at LAX. I suppose it's worth noting at this point that Jack doesn't know where Desmond is, and we don't see him on the plane either.
13 May 2009
Lost: Season Finale
A. Thanks for the memories, Caps. Next time, maybe some defense.
B. Two freaking hours of Lost. This is going to exhaust me mentally, isn't it?
The show opens with a dude using a loom and a fire, with the Black Rock sailing ship in the background and the giant statue intact. Ye Olden Times, I presume, and the man turns out to be Jacob.
We see Jacob as he intersects in the lives of most everyone on the Island. Young Kate tries to shoplift a New Kids on the Block lunch box, but Jacob shows up and pays for it. Jacob also visits Young Sawyer at his parents' funeral, is with Sayid when Nadia is hit by a car and killed, asks Ilana to do something for him (while she's in the hospital with her face bandaged), brings Locke back to life after he falls out of the window, is a guest at Jin and Sun's wedding, offers a candy bar to Jack, shares a cab with Hurley. In each of the scenarios, he gives the people words of wisdom, or the bit of encouragement they needed. It's like he was in their lives at a turning point, and he influenced them to go one way or the other.
Sawyer, Juliet, and Kate escape the sub in order to stop Jack from setting off the bomb. When they arrive on the Island, Vincent the dog greets them. And Rose and Bernard are there too! It's been 3 years and they're still there, living in peaceful, hippie retirement.
Sayid and Jack dismantle the nuclear bomb to remove the core so they can transport it to the Swan station site and blow it the eff up. As they walk through the Dharma village, Ben's dad sees them and shoots Sayid in the gut! Luckily Hurley, Jin, and Miles show up in a van and drive them away.
They are stopped along the way by a roadblock composed of Sawyer, Juliet, and Kate. Sawyer and Jack have a huge-ass fight until Juliet breaks them up, saying that Jack's right (OF COURSE HE IS). She's really only saying this out of jealousy. Why must everyone always be pining for Kate? Sawyer and Juliet are awesome together and Jack and Kate deserve each other's misery; just let things be. Anyway, since Sawyer is evidently pussy-whipped, he lets Jack do what he wants.
Jack takes the bomb to the site just as the drill is reaching the pocket of whatever-the-hell. That's when Miles says to everyone else, "Have you ever considered that maybe the nuclear bomb is the incident, not the drilling? So maybe the best thing to do is nothing?" Point for the Asian.
Jack shoots his way into the drilling site, as the rest of his cavalry comes driving in to provide him with cover. Jack drops the bomb down the shaft but nothing happens. Then everything metallic starts to get sucked down into the shaft, as clearly the electromagnetic whatchamacallit has been unleashed. Phil dies rather nicely, with some rebar to the chest. Juliet gets tangled up in chains and sucked down, despite Sawyer's efforts to hold onto her. So sad. I loved Sawyer and Juliet together. BOO!
Locke leads his people along the beach to find Jacob. They end up at the base of the giant statue, which is of course now just a foot. Jacob lives there. He's the Old Woman in a Shoe. Locke's all, "Come on, Ben, time for you to kill Jacob."
The other group of randoms from the latest crash (including Ilana and The Pilot) take a large cargo box to Jacob's cabin. When she finds the cabin empty, Ilana has her pals torch it, and they walk to the giant foot statue. She exchanges code words with Richard and tells him she has something to show him. WHAT'S IN THE BOX!? Locke's dead body. That's what I figured.
So who or what is the guy in the statue with Ben? Whoever he is, that guy and Ben find Jacob. Ben bitches at Jacob, all jealous that Locke gets to him immediately while Ben never got the chance to meet him. "What about me? Waaaah." Then Ben stabs him a few times. "They're coming," Jacob tells Locke before Locke pushes him into a fire, burning his ass to death.
Juliet's at the bottom of the shaft, and barely alive. She sees the bomb and whacks it a few times, finally detonating it.
The End. I mean, whuuuuuuuuuuuuuut? This was a good ass season finale. See you in 2010 for the final season!
B. Two freaking hours of Lost. This is going to exhaust me mentally, isn't it?
The show opens with a dude using a loom and a fire, with the Black Rock sailing ship in the background and the giant statue intact. Ye Olden Times, I presume, and the man turns out to be Jacob.
We see Jacob as he intersects in the lives of most everyone on the Island. Young Kate tries to shoplift a New Kids on the Block lunch box, but Jacob shows up and pays for it. Jacob also visits Young Sawyer at his parents' funeral, is with Sayid when Nadia is hit by a car and killed, asks Ilana to do something for him (while she's in the hospital with her face bandaged), brings Locke back to life after he falls out of the window, is a guest at Jin and Sun's wedding, offers a candy bar to Jack, shares a cab with Hurley. In each of the scenarios, he gives the people words of wisdom, or the bit of encouragement they needed. It's like he was in their lives at a turning point, and he influenced them to go one way or the other.
Sawyer, Juliet, and Kate escape the sub in order to stop Jack from setting off the bomb. When they arrive on the Island, Vincent the dog greets them. And Rose and Bernard are there too! It's been 3 years and they're still there, living in peaceful, hippie retirement.
Sayid and Jack dismantle the nuclear bomb to remove the core so they can transport it to the Swan station site and blow it the eff up. As they walk through the Dharma village, Ben's dad sees them and shoots Sayid in the gut! Luckily Hurley, Jin, and Miles show up in a van and drive them away.
They are stopped along the way by a roadblock composed of Sawyer, Juliet, and Kate. Sawyer and Jack have a huge-ass fight until Juliet breaks them up, saying that Jack's right (OF COURSE HE IS). She's really only saying this out of jealousy. Why must everyone always be pining for Kate? Sawyer and Juliet are awesome together and Jack and Kate deserve each other's misery; just let things be. Anyway, since Sawyer is evidently pussy-whipped, he lets Jack do what he wants.
Jack takes the bomb to the site just as the drill is reaching the pocket of whatever-the-hell. That's when Miles says to everyone else, "Have you ever considered that maybe the nuclear bomb is the incident, not the drilling? So maybe the best thing to do is nothing?" Point for the Asian.
Jack shoots his way into the drilling site, as the rest of his cavalry comes driving in to provide him with cover. Jack drops the bomb down the shaft but nothing happens. Then everything metallic starts to get sucked down into the shaft, as clearly the electromagnetic whatchamacallit has been unleashed. Phil dies rather nicely, with some rebar to the chest. Juliet gets tangled up in chains and sucked down, despite Sawyer's efforts to hold onto her. So sad. I loved Sawyer and Juliet together. BOO!
Locke leads his people along the beach to find Jacob. They end up at the base of the giant statue, which is of course now just a foot. Jacob lives there. He's the Old Woman in a Shoe. Locke's all, "Come on, Ben, time for you to kill Jacob."
The other group of randoms from the latest crash (including Ilana and The Pilot) take a large cargo box to Jacob's cabin. When she finds the cabin empty, Ilana has her pals torch it, and they walk to the giant foot statue. She exchanges code words with Richard and tells him she has something to show him. WHAT'S IN THE BOX!? Locke's dead body. That's what I figured.
So who or what is the guy in the statue with Ben? Whoever he is, that guy and Ben find Jacob. Ben bitches at Jacob, all jealous that Locke gets to him immediately while Ben never got the chance to meet him. "What about me? Waaaah." Then Ben stabs him a few times. "They're coming," Jacob tells Locke before Locke pushes him into a fire, burning his ass to death.
Juliet's at the bottom of the shaft, and barely alive. She sees the bomb and whacks it a few times, finally detonating it.
The End. I mean, whuuuuuuuuuuuuuut? This was a good ass season finale. See you in 2010 for the final season!
06 May 2009
Lost: More Mind-Effing
A. Bloody Penguins.
B. Lost.
Daniel's still dead. Charles kicks Jack and I cheer. Made his face all bloody and everything. Nicely done.
30 Years Later... and Richard still looks the same damn age. Richard tells Locke and Sun that he remembers Jack & Company coming to the Island 30 years ago, and he remembers because he watched them all die. Locke asks to see Jacob, but first he leads Ben and Richard to the heroin plane. Then he tells Richard what to say to the past version of Locke that comes traipsing through the jungle (you know, when he was shot and Richard told him to come back to the Island). My head is spinning as Locke watches Richard and Past Locke have their conversation and then Past Locke disappears. Once they're back at the beach, Locke addresses all of the Others and tells them he's going to see Jacob, and wants everyone to come with him. I'd be all, No thanks, you go talk to the invisible creepy dude, I'll just stay here on the beach and get some sun.
I still don't really get the timelines here and how the time travel works, but since Rule No. 1 on this show is "Jack is always right" I just have to accept what he says. He kind-of-explains things to Daniel's mother and 70s-Richard and tells them they need to detonate the bomb. Kate wants to go back to the village because she no likey nuclear bombs, and when one of the Others moves to kill her, Sayid shows up and sharp-shoots the bastard.
Sawyer is being questioned by the Dharmas, and punched a lot. Phil punches Juliet square in the face in an effort to get Sawyer to talk. This is one violent episode.
Dr. Chang catches Jin, Miles, and Hurley trying to escape the village. He believes they're from the future, and plans to evacuate the Island as Daniel had instructed. Sawyer and Juliet board a sub to leave with everyone else. Sawyer plans to escape Dharma's clutches once in Ann Arbor, and make a lot of money betting on Super Bowls and buying Microsoft. He and Juliet are lovey and happy... and that's when Kate boards the sub. Oops. Third wheel alert!
The sub departs (though next week they're back on the Island), and Jack, 70s-Richard & Company arrive at the bomb. "Now what?" asks Daniel's mother. Exactly.
The episode ends with Locke leading his people like Moses, down the beach to Jacob. Locke tells Ben that he plans to kill Jacob. That seems like a bold move, but I don't really know what it means.
B. Lost.
Daniel's still dead. Charles kicks Jack and I cheer. Made his face all bloody and everything. Nicely done.
30 Years Later... and Richard still looks the same damn age. Richard tells Locke and Sun that he remembers Jack & Company coming to the Island 30 years ago, and he remembers because he watched them all die. Locke asks to see Jacob, but first he leads Ben and Richard to the heroin plane. Then he tells Richard what to say to the past version of Locke that comes traipsing through the jungle (you know, when he was shot and Richard told him to come back to the Island). My head is spinning as Locke watches Richard and Past Locke have their conversation and then Past Locke disappears. Once they're back at the beach, Locke addresses all of the Others and tells them he's going to see Jacob, and wants everyone to come with him. I'd be all, No thanks, you go talk to the invisible creepy dude, I'll just stay here on the beach and get some sun.
I still don't really get the timelines here and how the time travel works, but since Rule No. 1 on this show is "Jack is always right" I just have to accept what he says. He kind-of-explains things to Daniel's mother and 70s-Richard and tells them they need to detonate the bomb. Kate wants to go back to the village because she no likey nuclear bombs, and when one of the Others moves to kill her, Sayid shows up and sharp-shoots the bastard.
Sawyer is being questioned by the Dharmas, and punched a lot. Phil punches Juliet square in the face in an effort to get Sawyer to talk. This is one violent episode.
Dr. Chang catches Jin, Miles, and Hurley trying to escape the village. He believes they're from the future, and plans to evacuate the Island as Daniel had instructed. Sawyer and Juliet board a sub to leave with everyone else. Sawyer plans to escape Dharma's clutches once in Ann Arbor, and make a lot of money betting on Super Bowls and buying Microsoft. He and Juliet are lovey and happy... and that's when Kate boards the sub. Oops. Third wheel alert!
The sub departs (though next week they're back on the Island), and Jack, 70s-Richard & Company arrive at the bomb. "Now what?" asks Daniel's mother. Exactly.
The episode ends with Locke leading his people like Moses, down the beach to Jacob. Locke tells Ben that he plans to kill Jacob. That seems like a bold move, but I don't really know what it means.
29 April 2009
Lost
In the 70s, Daniel shows up to the Dharma camp (he had been on assignment in Ann Arbor). He tells Jack that his mother was wrong and that they don't belong there. He tells Dr. Chang that he's from the future and everyone needs to evacuate the Island because their drilling has unleashed an electromagnetic something-or-other. And he tells him that Miles is his son.
Daniel goes off with Kate and Jack to find the Others so he can find his mother. First he stops off to see Charlotte as a little girl. And reminds Jack and Kate that they are in "their present" and so any of them can die. And gives me a headache explaining how, despite that, he's going to change the events that lead up to their plane crash by detonating the hydrogen bomb on the Island. I don't understand how he can change that, and have the flight not-crash, and still exist on the Island. If the flight never crashes, they never end up on the Island, right? Would they suddenly just disappear? I'll just wait to have it spoon fed to me.
Unfortunately, Daniel won't be testing his theory because he gets shot -- by his own mother! She knew all along that this was going to happen, that she was going to kill her own son. He looks dead to me. R.I.P. Jeremy Davies. I had just decided to use your character's name and everything. How sad.
There was a random clip from Star Trek during the break. Looked more like Starship Troopers Goes to the North Pole. Thank god it didn't give too much away - I'm on Media Blackout.
Daniel goes off with Kate and Jack to find the Others so he can find his mother. First he stops off to see Charlotte as a little girl. And reminds Jack and Kate that they are in "their present" and so any of them can die. And gives me a headache explaining how, despite that, he's going to change the events that lead up to their plane crash by detonating the hydrogen bomb on the Island. I don't understand how he can change that, and have the flight not-crash, and still exist on the Island. If the flight never crashes, they never end up on the Island, right? Would they suddenly just disappear? I'll just wait to have it spoon fed to me.
Unfortunately, Daniel won't be testing his theory because he gets shot -- by his own mother! She knew all along that this was going to happen, that she was going to kill her own son. He looks dead to me. R.I.P. Jeremy Davies. I had just decided to use your character's name and everything. How sad.
There was a random clip from Star Trek during the break. Looked more like Starship Troopers Goes to the North Pole. Thank god it didn't give too much away - I'm on Media Blackout.
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