It's the most wonderful time of the year.
Enjoy it!
31 October 2008
30 October 2008
RW/RR: The Island
The finale! Yay! What a lovely surprise.
Dan - who was in the freaking military, right? and appears to be in good shape - drops out of the Face-Off almost instantaneously. That's what alcohol will do to you I guess.
Winner: Ev. Duh. Johnny kisses her ass and apologizes.
Bye bye: Dan, Johanna, and Kellyanne, because they lost the Face-Off. Ev takes Dunbar's key. Well, that was semi-exciting, mostly because the crappy editing job on that weird, cut-up, rambling speech made it look like Ev was taking Johnny's.
They have to quickly make two teams for the boats. The dudes quickly ditch Paula.
1. Kenny, Ev, Derrick, and Johnny.
2. Robin, Paula, Ryan, and Jenn. And Dunbar ends up helping them finish the boat, out of spite for the other team. Good one, Dunbar. I don't know who you are, or why you have that retarded name, but you're cool for that.
Geez, it's not too slanted, is it? LOL the gay dude is with the girls and the lesbian is with the guys. And the outcome is clear. The Dudes' Team wins. Paula's bitter, but I'm not sure what she expected. Of course they sold her up the river. They don't care about her!
Dan - who was in the freaking military, right? and appears to be in good shape - drops out of the Face-Off almost instantaneously. That's what alcohol will do to you I guess.
Winner: Ev. Duh. Johnny kisses her ass and apologizes.
Bye bye: Dan, Johanna, and Kellyanne, because they lost the Face-Off. Ev takes Dunbar's key. Well, that was semi-exciting, mostly because the crappy editing job on that weird, cut-up, rambling speech made it look like Ev was taking Johnny's.
They have to quickly make two teams for the boats. The dudes quickly ditch Paula.
1. Kenny, Ev, Derrick, and Johnny.
2. Robin, Paula, Ryan, and Jenn. And Dunbar ends up helping them finish the boat, out of spite for the other team. Good one, Dunbar. I don't know who you are, or why you have that retarded name, but you're cool for that.
Geez, it's not too slanted, is it? LOL the gay dude is with the girls and the lesbian is with the guys. And the outcome is clear. The Dudes' Team wins. Paula's bitter, but I'm not sure what she expected. Of course they sold her up the river. They don't care about her!
29 October 2008
Can We Just Vote Already!?
As always, The Daily Show sums up exactly what I'm thinking. Can we just end it already!?
New 24 Trailer
Here's a link to the new 24 Season 7 trailer. Perfect for Halloween, as it says, "It's time to raise the dead." We get lots of Jack in sunglasses, a brief glimpse of Bill Buchanan (!), some Chloe, and a Jack/Tony fight. Is it January yet!?
27 October 2008
Heroes
Arthur tells Peter his abilities are gone forever. Being The Most Powerful didn't last long for Peter, did it? I love Arthur and his Chicago accent, but damn he has all the powers. Not fair.
Mohinder The Fly takes off - literally. Grabs Maya and flies out of his lab, taking her to Pinehearst. Where Arthur sucks Maya's ability right out of her. Problem: solved. Maya leaves. Like really, really leaves? Do you promise!? BYE!!!!
Arthur asks Mohinder to work with him on the formula so that Mohinder can keep his new powers, but get rid of those nasty Fly side effects. In order to do this, Mohinder needs to experiment on people. Lab Rat No. 1: Peter. But Sylar shows up and BAM! Saves Peter! But then Mohinder jumps on Sylar, bashing his head into the floor and generally going ape-S. Arthur stops him, telling him Sylar's his son.
Claire and her mom come home to find Elle. Elle has lost control of her powers and is shorting out the joint. Mini cat fight! They both have Pinehearst business cards and decide to go there together to see if they can fix their problems. Elle and Claire are my new favorite lesbian couple. They're so cute together.
Arthur sends Daphne to kill Matt, after he kills Matt's dad. But she can't possibly kill him, what with all his creepy we-get-married-in-the-future talk. Knox shows up to check on them, and Matt makes Knox believe that he's killed them. He can make illusions? Oh yeah I guess his dad could.
Arthur tells Gabriel that Angela tried to drown him in the bathtub when he was born because she had a vision of what he'd become. Jesus. Mother of the Year that Angela Petrelli is. So now Gabriel is on Arthur's side. Only he might not be - because when he threw Peter out of a window, he used his ability to slow him down and break his fall.
African Dude tells Hiro he has to go back in time to prevent certain things from taking place. But he hates going back in time, because it never works out. So instead he does that Vision thing that Matt did.
Line of the Night: Bennet, when asked what Mohinder was doing. "Building a nest, laying eggs, who knows?"
Two weeks until the next episode - where we get a look at the past. Again.
Mohinder The Fly takes off - literally. Grabs Maya and flies out of his lab, taking her to Pinehearst. Where Arthur sucks Maya's ability right out of her. Problem: solved. Maya leaves. Like really, really leaves? Do you promise!? BYE!!!!
Arthur asks Mohinder to work with him on the formula so that Mohinder can keep his new powers, but get rid of those nasty Fly side effects. In order to do this, Mohinder needs to experiment on people. Lab Rat No. 1: Peter. But Sylar shows up and BAM! Saves Peter! But then Mohinder jumps on Sylar, bashing his head into the floor and generally going ape-S. Arthur stops him, telling him Sylar's his son.
Claire and her mom come home to find Elle. Elle has lost control of her powers and is shorting out the joint. Mini cat fight! They both have Pinehearst business cards and decide to go there together to see if they can fix their problems. Elle and Claire are my new favorite lesbian couple. They're so cute together.
Arthur sends Daphne to kill Matt, after he kills Matt's dad. But she can't possibly kill him, what with all his creepy we-get-married-in-the-future talk. Knox shows up to check on them, and Matt makes Knox believe that he's killed them. He can make illusions? Oh yeah I guess his dad could.
Arthur tells Gabriel that Angela tried to drown him in the bathtub when he was born because she had a vision of what he'd become. Jesus. Mother of the Year that Angela Petrelli is. So now Gabriel is on Arthur's side. Only he might not be - because when he threw Peter out of a window, he used his ability to slow him down and break his fall.
African Dude tells Hiro he has to go back in time to prevent certain things from taking place. But he hates going back in time, because it never works out. So instead he does that Vision thing that Matt did.
Line of the Night: Bennet, when asked what Mohinder was doing. "Building a nest, laying eggs, who knows?"
Two weeks until the next episode - where we get a look at the past. Again.
Watchmen Trailer
Also available in HD. You can totally see Dr. Manhattan's junk!!! Not that I paused it or anything....
26 October 2008
Funniest Baby Ever!
Amy Poehler and Will Arnett welcomed their son Archie Arnett on Saturday in New York City.
Damn, she didn't make it until after the election. But at least she made it through all of those Thursday editions of Weekend Update!
25 October 2008
Worst Week Ever
Oh. My. God. I HATE HATE HATE the new format of Best Week Ever with Paul F. Tompkins. I love Paul, I do. But the host format sucks so hard for this show. I miss all my little guys and their little comments. Damn.
24 October 2008
I'm Going To Vote Early, I Swear!
My friend Natalie sent me this glimpse of the future - apparently if I don't vote I'll be responsible for a McCain win. There's early voting in Florida, so I'm going to try to vote tomorrow!
Because I don't need "Jennifer = Loser" graffiti!
Click here for the site where you can customize the video. It's cute!
23 October 2008
RW/RR: The Island
Poor Ev has no friends, unless you count that little bug she was petting. Ew.
Colie's still here!? Has she done anything all season? And now she's expecting to just sit back and get a key. Haha. This does not sit well with Johnny, the Bully of this season. Do you know how much I wish someone like Coral were there to smack Johnny down a few pegs? He really is a giant dick.
I love Paula: "I'm not anti-girl, I'm anti-stupid." The others girls all want to build a boat, but Paula wants the guys to take care of it. That's my kind of girl - lie back and let the men do all the work.
Face Off: Colie, Johanna, and Ryan. It's an endurance competition.
Winner: Ryan. He takes KellyAnne's key.
Bye-bye: Colie. She asked the jury to send her home. I didn't really follow the reasons behind that, but she was pretty much going to be sent home anyway. So maybe that's why she did it.
Only one Face Off left, and the four people without keys have to be in it. So someone with a key will definitely lose it next week.
Colie's still here!? Has she done anything all season? And now she's expecting to just sit back and get a key. Haha. This does not sit well with Johnny, the Bully of this season. Do you know how much I wish someone like Coral were there to smack Johnny down a few pegs? He really is a giant dick.
I love Paula: "I'm not anti-girl, I'm anti-stupid." The others girls all want to build a boat, but Paula wants the guys to take care of it. That's my kind of girl - lie back and let the men do all the work.
Face Off: Colie, Johanna, and Ryan. It's an endurance competition.
Winner: Ryan. He takes KellyAnne's key.
Bye-bye: Colie. She asked the jury to send her home. I didn't really follow the reasons behind that, but she was pretty much going to be sent home anyway. So maybe that's why she did it.
Only one Face Off left, and the four people without keys have to be in it. So someone with a key will definitely lose it next week.
22 October 2008
21 October 2008
Fringe
A woman is dumped out of a car, hangs out in a diner, and makes everyone's eyeballs bleed, including her own - until her head explodes all over the glass door. I love this show!!
I love that Walter refers to that chick's body as "the headless one." THIS IS THE GROSSEST SHOW ON TELEVISION BECAUSE THEY TOTALLY SHOWED THE HEADLESS BODY WHILE THEY EXAMINED IT!!!!! PUKE!!
Other than that, another good story about people being experimented on. We find out some stuff about Olivia's abusive-stepfather-she-shot.
Walter's Craving of the Week: Cotton candy. Blue, not pink. I love Walter!!
Moment Where I Wept: Pacey tells his dad to remember that Pacey's toothbrush is red. "White for Walter. That's me." I JUST WANT TO SQUEEZE THIS MAN!
Three whole weeks til the next new episode.
I love that Walter refers to that chick's body as "the headless one." THIS IS THE GROSSEST SHOW ON TELEVISION BECAUSE THEY TOTALLY SHOWED THE HEADLESS BODY WHILE THEY EXAMINED IT!!!!! PUKE!!
Other than that, another good story about people being experimented on. We find out some stuff about Olivia's abusive-stepfather-she-shot.
Walter's Craving of the Week: Cotton candy. Blue, not pink. I love Walter!!
Moment Where I Wept: Pacey tells his dad to remember that Pacey's toothbrush is red. "White for Walter. That's me." I JUST WANT TO SQUEEZE THIS MAN!
Three whole weeks til the next new episode.
Prison Break
Michael drops the news on Sara that Gretchen's alive. Alive and joining up with the team because they need information that she and T-Bag have. Sara no likey Gretchen, because Gretchen tortured her ass and fake-decapitated her.
The Asian Guy's grounded because he lost the device in the casino. He texts the Big Black Assassin, asking how much he wants for Michael and Lincoln. The answer: a cool million.
This week's plan involved crashing into the Bad Bald Guy's limo, pulling him out, getting his card, etc. The whole thing goes pear-shaped when the Asian Guy rats them out. Sucre is shot, but Dr. Sara performs some icky surgery and saves him.
Gretchen offers Sara a cease-fire - and the chance to whip her like she had whipped Sara. Hot. Instead, Sara just lets her know she's pissed that Gretchen killed a guard who helped her escape. And that she will have her VENGEANCE!
The Assassin treats the Asian Guy the way any rat should be treated - he backs out on his end of the deal and shoots him in the knees. And the gut. The Gang shows up and Mahone beats the living crap out of the Assassin. Go Mahone! And R.I.P. Asian Guy.
The Asian Guy's grounded because he lost the device in the casino. He texts the Big Black Assassin, asking how much he wants for Michael and Lincoln. The answer: a cool million.
This week's plan involved crashing into the Bad Bald Guy's limo, pulling him out, getting his card, etc. The whole thing goes pear-shaped when the Asian Guy rats them out. Sucre is shot, but Dr. Sara performs some icky surgery and saves him.
Gretchen offers Sara a cease-fire - and the chance to whip her like she had whipped Sara. Hot. Instead, Sara just lets her know she's pissed that Gretchen killed a guard who helped her escape. And that she will have her VENGEANCE!
The Assassin treats the Asian Guy the way any rat should be treated - he backs out on his end of the deal and shoots him in the knees. And the gut. The Gang shows up and Mahone beats the living crap out of the Assassin. Go Mahone! And R.I.P. Asian Guy.
20 October 2008
Heroes
Last week, Hiro "killed" Ando, but of course it didn't actually happen. We find out that he staged it with a fake sword and fake blood, so he could infiltrate Knox and Daphne's little evil alliance thing. Thank goodness. Daphne gives Hiro his assignment: go to Africa and get that painter dude.
Daphne's next assignment is Matt. Or maybe his turtle. Because Matt and his turtle are in the airport. They meet up and she tells him about the company she works for, how she wants to recruit him. He tells her about the vision he had about them being married. She finds it "stalky" - good for her, it's creepy.
Claire goes off to find Meredith, who's with the puppet master dude, and Sandra goes with her. "One of us, one of them," Sandra says. Oh how sweet. Darling, go back to making cupcakes and raising show dogs, this can't end well for you. The Puppet Master has the greatest, creepiest power ever!!!!
He's got Meredith under his spell and then he gets Sandra. And Claire. Great job, ladies, you really stuck it to the bad guys. Russian Roulette time!! It happens predictably - the bullet hits Claire, she "dies", the Puppet Master's hold is released, and then she regenerates and knocks him out. Bennet comes to pick up the Puppet Master and asks Meredith for her help.
Knox takes Adam to see Papa Petrelli, still lying in bed all hooked up to machines. Arthur latches on to Adam's hand and freaking sucks the life force out of him or something!!! WHAT!? ADAM IS DEAD!? He has to be, he turned into a skeleton and crumbled to the ground. There ain't no coming back from that S. And now Arthur is alive and well and off to kick some Petrelli Family ass.
I'm pretty bitter, because I thought Adam was cool as S and had all kinds of potential, considering he was a funny little 400-year-old bastard with a big Company history. Oh well, I guess they're finally cleaning house on this show. But why did it have to be Adam!!??
Daphne shows up in Sylar's cell to spring him. He won't go because he wants to be good now, but she leaves her card - for the new Company, Pinehearst. Sylar goes to see Peter and frees him from his drug-induced coma, telling him their mother is in trouble, and he thinks he found a way to control the hunger. If he can control it, then Peter can. And they can just be two hotass superpowered brothers, without that pesky hunger to murder.
Angela's in a coma and Sylar asks Peter to look inside her head to figure out what's wrong. All Peter sees is a symbol, the logo for Pinehearst. Sylar and Peter have a superpowered fight, and Peter ends up winning, putting Sylar into a drug-induced coma and taking off to go to Pinehearst.
Nathan and Tracy show up at Scaly!Mohinder's lab/loft. They fill him in on how Dr. Zimmerman created her and the other Ali Larters, and how Nathan was given his power as well. He says he can help them, try to figure out how it was done, how to take it away. So he injects them, saying he's marking their DNA - but instead they both pass out. Oh Mohinder, you murdering bastard you.
Daphne shows up to Mohinder's. She says Pinehearst has already figured out how to give people abilities, and that they need to help each other. She passes along her card, and then finds Nathan and Tracy being held in that room full of spiderweb cocoon things. She runs off, presumably to tell someone and try to get some help for them. Otherwise that's just rude.
Tracy uses her freezing power to break out of her restraints and free Nathan, but Mohinder catches them.
Peter's a little shocked to see his dead daddy alive. Daddy hugs him -- and takes away his abilities. And absorbs them for himself. So now Peter is powerless and Arthur is the most powerful person on the show. This Petrelli Family is really effed up.
Daphne's next assignment is Matt. Or maybe his turtle. Because Matt and his turtle are in the airport. They meet up and she tells him about the company she works for, how she wants to recruit him. He tells her about the vision he had about them being married. She finds it "stalky" - good for her, it's creepy.
Claire goes off to find Meredith, who's with the puppet master dude, and Sandra goes with her. "One of us, one of them," Sandra says. Oh how sweet. Darling, go back to making cupcakes and raising show dogs, this can't end well for you. The Puppet Master has the greatest, creepiest power ever!!!!
He's got Meredith under his spell and then he gets Sandra. And Claire. Great job, ladies, you really stuck it to the bad guys. Russian Roulette time!! It happens predictably - the bullet hits Claire, she "dies", the Puppet Master's hold is released, and then she regenerates and knocks him out. Bennet comes to pick up the Puppet Master and asks Meredith for her help.
Knox takes Adam to see Papa Petrelli, still lying in bed all hooked up to machines. Arthur latches on to Adam's hand and freaking sucks the life force out of him or something!!! WHAT!? ADAM IS DEAD!? He has to be, he turned into a skeleton and crumbled to the ground. There ain't no coming back from that S. And now Arthur is alive and well and off to kick some Petrelli Family ass.
I'm pretty bitter, because I thought Adam was cool as S and had all kinds of potential, considering he was a funny little 400-year-old bastard with a big Company history. Oh well, I guess they're finally cleaning house on this show. But why did it have to be Adam!!??
Daphne shows up in Sylar's cell to spring him. He won't go because he wants to be good now, but she leaves her card - for the new Company, Pinehearst. Sylar goes to see Peter and frees him from his drug-induced coma, telling him their mother is in trouble, and he thinks he found a way to control the hunger. If he can control it, then Peter can. And they can just be two hotass superpowered brothers, without that pesky hunger to murder.
Angela's in a coma and Sylar asks Peter to look inside her head to figure out what's wrong. All Peter sees is a symbol, the logo for Pinehearst. Sylar and Peter have a superpowered fight, and Peter ends up winning, putting Sylar into a drug-induced coma and taking off to go to Pinehearst.
Nathan and Tracy show up at Scaly!Mohinder's lab/loft. They fill him in on how Dr. Zimmerman created her and the other Ali Larters, and how Nathan was given his power as well. He says he can help them, try to figure out how it was done, how to take it away. So he injects them, saying he's marking their DNA - but instead they both pass out. Oh Mohinder, you murdering bastard you.
Daphne shows up to Mohinder's. She says Pinehearst has already figured out how to give people abilities, and that they need to help each other. She passes along her card, and then finds Nathan and Tracy being held in that room full of spiderweb cocoon things. She runs off, presumably to tell someone and try to get some help for them. Otherwise that's just rude.
Tracy uses her freezing power to break out of her restraints and free Nathan, but Mohinder catches them.
Peter's a little shocked to see his dead daddy alive. Daddy hugs him -- and takes away his abilities. And absorbs them for himself. So now Peter is powerless and Arthur is the most powerful person on the show. This Petrelli Family is really effed up.
Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
The show recently got a full season pick up so yay for more Terminator.
This week was Family Psychology Week. John talks to a counselor and so does the Shirley Manson Terminator's daughter. She's weirded out by her, because kids can sense when their mothers have turned into liquid-metal Terminators, duh. And liquid-metal Terminators make really really bad, emotionally distant mothers.
David Silver's girlfriend in the future has been sent back to this time, and he sees her in the park and catches up to her. She's gone AWOL from the war, and is just kickin' it in a hotel, chillin' in the past. Must be nice. Of course this does not turn David Silver on. David Silver does not like a coward. But then he comes back later, and he does. Cuz, let's face it, David Silver NEEDS TO GET LAID!
We get a new freaky Terminator chick in the mix, as one pops in from the future. And this one has really bad hair. She's come to kill the psychologist. She and Cameron meet up and beat the crap out of each other. A crazy, weird acrobatic fight that ends with the other chick all folded up, the heel of her boot stuck in her eye. Gross!
In the end, Shirley Manson offers the psychologist a job - to help her "raise" the AI she's making, since it's like a child.
This week was Family Psychology Week. John talks to a counselor and so does the Shirley Manson Terminator's daughter. She's weirded out by her, because kids can sense when their mothers have turned into liquid-metal Terminators, duh. And liquid-metal Terminators make really really bad, emotionally distant mothers.
David Silver's girlfriend in the future has been sent back to this time, and he sees her in the park and catches up to her. She's gone AWOL from the war, and is just kickin' it in a hotel, chillin' in the past. Must be nice. Of course this does not turn David Silver on. David Silver does not like a coward. But then he comes back later, and he does. Cuz, let's face it, David Silver NEEDS TO GET LAID!
We get a new freaky Terminator chick in the mix, as one pops in from the future. And this one has really bad hair. She's come to kill the psychologist. She and Cameron meet up and beat the crap out of each other. A crazy, weird acrobatic fight that ends with the other chick all folded up, the heel of her boot stuck in her eye. Gross!
In the end, Shirley Manson offers the psychologist a job - to help her "raise" the AI she's making, since it's like a child.
RW/RR: The Island
Finally watched last week's episode of The Island. That's how fascinating and important this thing is in my life right now.
Blah blah Dan and Robin are freaking lunatic alcoholics. Robin tells people they didn't screw because he went limp. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA And now she's "dead to him" - LOL! You know it's bad when Derrick - DERRICK - thinks you're drinking too much and need to be controlled.
Blah Blah Johnny and Ev hate each other.
Face Off: Cohutta (WTF is that name, honestly?), Johnny, and Derrick (who is going in to help Johnny, secretly). The Face Off doesn't lend itself to Derrick being able to help Johnny - it's more of an individual event.
Winner: Johnny. He takes his key back from Ev.
Bye-bye: Cohutta, your lame ass, your lame accent, and your lame name.
Blah blah Dan and Robin are freaking lunatic alcoholics. Robin tells people they didn't screw because he went limp. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA And now she's "dead to him" - LOL! You know it's bad when Derrick - DERRICK - thinks you're drinking too much and need to be controlled.
Blah Blah Johnny and Ev hate each other.
Face Off: Cohutta (WTF is that name, honestly?), Johnny, and Derrick (who is going in to help Johnny, secretly). The Face Off doesn't lend itself to Derrick being able to help Johnny - it's more of an individual event.
Winner: Johnny. He takes his key back from Ev.
Bye-bye: Cohutta, your lame ass, your lame accent, and your lame name.
19 October 2008
Mark Wahlberg Makes It Up To Me
Mark, I hated your movie. In fact, I hated your last two movies. But that's OK, I still like you.
I posted the brilliant Mark Wahlberg impression Andy Samberg did two weeks ago. Then Mark was in the press and on talk shows bitching about it, saying he didn't think it was funny and that he wanted to punch Andy in the face. But I'll bet that was all just set-up for this week, because he came on Saturday Night Live and it was hysterical!
Max Payne Angers Me
I know what you're thinking. "You saw Max Payne? But doesn't it have like a 17% on Rotten Tomatoes? I thought it was your policy not to see anything rated less than 69%!?"
STFU. You're right, of course. But sometimes I make exceptions. Like when I figure it's the kind of movie critics won't like, but I'll still enjoy the mindless fun.
I did not, in fact, enjoy the mindless "fun" that is Max Payne. I went into this movie loving the trailers and the clips I had seen at Comic-Con. And expecting massive amounts of gun porn. Well, apparently I had seen all the good clips - and all the gun porn clips. BECAUSE THIS WAS NO GUN PORN!!!
OK, fine. You're entitled to wrap plot around a gun porn movie. Absolutely. But not boring plot!! I literally was struggling to keep my eyes open. The set-up was taking way too long. And then the payoff's not even good.
Ugh. This movie is a lot like Hitman - you think it's going to be gloriously stylized violence and it isn't. It gives you blue balls.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)