24: Lots of CAPSLOCK Ahead

It's 1:00. Lunch time: over.

LARRY'S EYES ARE TOO CLOSE TOGETHER! I'm sorry, I know I say it every time but GODDAMN!!! I was clawing at my face having to look into those horrid, beady eyes. They drive me nuts and I can't pay attention to anything happening at the FBI now. I want him shot between the eyes, yet something tells me a bullet wouldn't fit between them. *rimshot*

Chloe and Bill show up to dig up Renee. She's not breathing. Yeah, no crap, she was freaking covered in plastic. Jack could have left her a breathing hole. Lame. Bill gives her a shot of adrenaline and all is well. But she has to "stay dead" or else the undercover operation will be outed.

OH MY GOD TONY NEEDS A HUG AND NEEDS ONE NOW AND I AM HERE TO GIVE IT TO HIM!!! Am I the only one who says "Yeah" along with Tony now? You just always know when they're coming. And tonight Jack seemed to want to steal Tony's thunder with his own "yeah"s.

David, the leader of Tony's crew and his new "BFF", takes Jack hostage and Tony's got a gun on them. Who will he choose? WELL HE CHOOSES HIS REAL BFF, JACK, DUH and shoots David in the neck. R.I.P. David. Tony's all conflicted and emo about it. Poor Tony.

Things heat up in the White House Subplot when the Big Bad calls up the President, tells her to look out her window, and collides two airplanes in midair. HOLY CRAP!!! I really like this President. She kicks ass. I don't understand why her advisors want to freaking negotiate with terrorists. THE UNITED STATES DOES NOT NEGOTIATE WITH TERRORISTS!!! Stand your ground, Madame President.

The Bad Secret Service guy slices and dices the President's dead son's fiancee right in front of the paralyzed-but-still-alert First Gentleman. Nice. Also nice? The Secret Service guy is wearing those gloves that horse inseminators wear. (I watch a lot of Dirty Jobs.) R.I.P. President's Dead Son's Fiancee.

The First Gentleman gets un-paralyzed enough to kick the Secret Service guy's ass as he's about to hang him, toppling them both over a railing. R.I.P. Bad Secret Service Guy.

Jack's plan is to still hand over the Prime Minister in order to get to the Big Bad. Chloe hooks him up with transmitters. The exchange is made - the PM for diamonds - and Sniper!Jack saves Tony's life when he's about to be killed. Time to move out and follow the target!

Next Terrorist Target: a chemical plant in some dump town in Ohio. You can have it. It's OHIO!