Two more episodes ever ever ever. Mike actually says we shouldn't bother watching this show anymore if it's not going to wrap-up neatly. I say he's made me watch it this long, he's not getting off that easy. It does make it easier, knowing I don't have to watch this for much longer....
Leila's dumb hybrid ass has altered the Spanish Flu virus so that it will spread the way the aliens want it to. But Sophia seems to be having a change of heart. For the 15th time.
That Annoying Prick Sean and Vicky are driving and bitching about something. They're tracking down... the courier's helper I guess? Hell if I know, I always feel like I lose time when watching this show. Alien Asian Hottie and Sterling are there looking for the same dude. So now we have Team Awesome vs. Team Suck. Stay away from the only awesome things on this show, goddamn you! Team Suck fills Team Awesome in on the Spanish Flu plan and then they all pick through the dude's trash. Team Suck is already dragging my men down....
Sophia has a good plan for spreading the disease - through supermarkets, currency, and Dulles Airport. We find out the Aliens were here first and think they're just taking back that which is rightfully theirs - the Earth. They start transporting the kegs of Spanish Flu.
President Underwood wakes up from his coma just as the First Lady is giving President Asshole a good talking to. She was so just about to smack him into the next century. The First Lady brings President Underwood up to speed (Sterling/Simon saved him) and then he calls Sterling, who brings him even more up to speed (President Asshole working with Sophia/Spanish Flu).
That Annoying Prick Sean hacks his way into the NSA satellites so they can track the dude (starting from a gas station receipt). It doesn't take long for them to find his location, which is the new alien hangout. As they drive there, Simon is all, "Hey, is that an ancient scroll in your glove compartment?"
Sophia orders Leila executed to put her out of her Spanish Flu misery. She slips her restraints as the doctor is about to inject her, and then Sean arrives. Leila stays in her plastic bubble - she's infected after all. Oh no, I'm sorry, let me put it how she did: "They put it in me." Jesus, this bitch is dumb. Also, that's what she said.
Hey I have a question - why would the aliens have put Leila in her plastic bubble? They're immune to the Spanish Flu, what the hell would they care if they were exposed? Oh right - plot device. We have to endure a scene of these 2 idiots talking to each other through the plastic. PUKE!
President Underwood insists on going to the White House and busts in on President Asshole in the Oval Office. "Get the hell out of my office." BOOYAH! President Asshole is all, "You have to be proved to be capable and you're a hot mess, go screw."
Simon threatens the alien doctor with a drill to the head, which is pretty cool, and she gives up the computer password so now Team Awesome can see the virus distribution plans. What - Sean couldn't hack it? I guess he was busy.
That Alien Array Thing powers up, communicating with the home planet.
If there's a god, the finale will only be one hour long.