Hurricane Season Is Fun

This is always the fun time of year when you get really encouraging weather forecasts like this one. Nothing better than a big, fat, red question mark on your weather forecast.

Women Can't Lead

John McCain has chosen Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin to be his vice-presidential candidate on the Republican ticket for the White House, a senior McCain campaign official has told CNN. The 44-year-old Palin, now in her first term as governor, is a pioneering figure in Alaska, the first woman and the youngest person to hold the state's top political job.

But women get, like, periods and stuff. And McCain's gonna die while in office. And then what - I have to live in a country ruled by a hormonal woman? I don't think so.

In all seriousness though, this is turning out to be quite the historic presidential race, whichever way it goes. Kinda cool.

Max Payne Trailer

'Max Payne' Theatrical Trailer @ Yahoo! Video

Here's the full trailer for Max Payne, which still looks really cool. Marlo from The Wire! Sucre from Prison Break! And I'm sorry can we all agree that Mila Kunis is hot as balls?

Mulder, You Dog!

David Duchovny is currently at a rehabilitation center for sex addiction.

“I have voluntarily entered a facility for the treatment of sex addiction,” the former X-Files star’s lawyer tells People. “I ask for respect and privacy for my wife and children as we deal with this situation as a family.”

Duchovny, 48, has been married to actress Téa Leoni for over 10 years and they have two children together – daughter Madelaine, 9, and son Kyd, 6.

Back in May, Best Life reported, “There was the time [Duchovny] confessed to a reporter about his fascination with hotel porn (’I like to watch other people —k’ was the exact quote) and rumors swirled that he was a sex addict.”

Screw his privacy - I want details!!

BBX: Double Eviction!

WTH? Double Eviction Night? Did they tell us this in advance? I must have missed it, what with all the fast-forwarding I do. YAY HOORAY!

Michelle is predictably pissed about being nominated. In that brash Michelle way. Ollie calls Dan out for breaking their deal. Dan walks away. LOL! He's such an asshole. Ollie raged out and broke stuff.

First Eviction: Michelle. At least I don't have to look at her or hear her voice anymore.

Ultra-Fast Head of Household: Keesha. DAMMIT! Jerry was thisclose.

Ultra-Fast Nominations: Jerry and Ollie.

Ultra-Fast Power of Veto: Dan. Doesn't use it.

Second Eviction: Ollie. He just fails at this game. He didn't even look like he was trying he was so pissed after the HoH Competition. Hell, he was pissed after Dan's crap. Now he can see his girlfriend at least.

This totally sucks though because he was the only one left that I liked. I'M BITTER! I love how he just got right up and walked out. Much love, Ollie!

Now the big alliance gets to cannibalize each other. That should be fun. Ish.

Harrisburg Represent!

My hometown (one of many) of Harrisburg, PA got a great shout-out on The Colbert Report last night. This guy is a gem. A gem I tell you!

Project Runway

Challenge: Create an outfit from Saturn car parts. WTH? Most bizarre challenge yet!

Kenley better watch out - if she keeps whining about how much her life sucks because her model dropped out, I might not love her as much anymore. Woe is you, Kenley. Get over it.

Stella has a boyfriend named "Ratbones". Of course she does.

Keith continued his tradition of being a Giant Dick. Especially when his model sat down in his skirt and ripped it. Hahahahaha.

They came up with some amazing outfits, I was really surprised. I really liked Kenley's and Terri's. Apparently, I drink their Kool-Aid - the judges put them in the middle of the pack.

Blayne's was just a mess of seat belts sewn together that didn't fit properly. Ew. I didn't like Stella's either; the skirt was a good concept with poor execution and it didn't relate to the top. And then there's Keith's half-sewn monstrosity. All thrown together and just wrong. Of course he whined about how he was criticized so much last challenge and so he tried something different. Quit your bitching, ass.

Korto's jacket was amazing.

Winner: Leanne. The Plainest Plain Girl to Ever Live.

Bye-bye: Keith. GOOD RIDDANCE! I laughed when he cried. I'm sorry, not cried - bawled his lame-ass head off. Hate!

BBX: Power of Veto

America voted on which Houseguest should get a phone call from home. All of them boo-hooed about how much they'd like to win. Jerry won. Awwwww. It's just too sweet watching old people speak to each other, even if Jerry can be a bastard. And sounds like Gary the Retard.

Dan doesn't plan to keep his agreement with Ollie - if someone gets off the block with the Power of Veto, Dan plans to put up Michelle.

BUT - Ollie wasn't eligible to play in the PoV competition - so if someone wins it, he can be put up. That would really break the deal!! This made me extra anxious during the competition, when normally I'd be fast-forwarding through it.

Power of Veto: Memphis. So he took himself off the block.

I didn't get Dan's little "Replacement Nominee Roulette" AT ALL. He thought it was so brilliant. He made the HG's tell him who should be nominated, but he told them all about it in advance and told them who to choose. So what? They each chose an enemy anyway. As with everything Dan did, it was overly complicated and pointless.

Replacement Nominee: Michelle.

DAN IS A LIAR! HE SWORE ON ST. MARY'S!!! DOES HIS FOOTBALL TEAM MEAN NOTHING TO HIM?? IS NOTHING SACRED?? DIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIE

Oh Hells Yes

I wish I could explain my love for this trailer for Fast & Furious. I can't. I wasn't even aware that I liked the first one so much, but I must have because I am excited about the original cast getting together. Who knows.
Fast & Furious in HD

BBX: Nominations

Wow, that endurance competition looked painful - hanging from a rope and then banging into a wall, all while being in the cold rain? Yuck. It came down to Dan and Ollie, and I was just waiting for them to make a deal. Dan offered Ollie this crazy deal wherein essentially Dan is just a Figurehead Head of Household. Ollie choose who gets nominated, and if the Power of Veto is used, Ollie chooses a substitute nominee. Wow. Dan loves to think he's faking weakness, but I don't know he just might be weak. Were those fake tears, or is he just a pussy? Methinks he doth protest too much.

Was this a smart deal? It's smart because it puts the blood on Ollie's hands. However, this could be a great thing for Ollie if it works out, since Ollie is essentially HoH this week AND is eligible to compete for it next week. However, part of me wonders if Dan will screw Ollie over and nominate him if the PoV is used. Dan did swear on his girlfriend and St. Mary's though, so I don't think he's going back on his word.

Is there a way I can win this year's Big Brother kitchen? Cuz I WANT.

Nominated: Jerry and Memphis.

Transporter 3 Teaser

Couldn't find F&F, but I found this. I like the Transporter movies. I suppose for the same reasons I noted in my liking of Death Race. Guns, cars, muscles, violence. It's all good. The third one comes with a bonus: Robert Knepper as the bad guy. Can I get an Amen?

Cars Cars Everywhere Cars

Do you like guns? Do you like cars? Do you like guns on cars? Do you like well-built guys in and out of wifebeaters and tight shirts? Do you like senseless violence and swearing?

If you answered "No" to any of these questions, I don't want to know you. If, however, you like all of these things, see Death Race. There are far worse ways to spend a rainy afternoon. It was a lot of mindless fun and I loved it.

There were a couple new trailers in front of it that were cool too: Transporter 3 and Fast and Furious. I know what you're thinking - wasn't that already a movie? No. There was The Fast and the Furious. This would be another sequel, without those pesky "the"s. It's got EVERYONE from the original cast, it looks HELLA kickass. I think we're supposed to pretend the others didn't happen. I'm going to see if I can find the trailer online.

It's True! It's True!!

OMG you guys it's totally true! Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling are back together! Best News of the Day!

(Maybe not for my buddy David, but I love them together!)

BBX: Eviction

Awww. April and Ollie Showmance Retrospective. I love him so much. Her I go back and forth on. She can be needy and whiny, but that's probably just cuz she's a girl and that's how girls are.

Hot tip for Renny: If you want Memphis gone so badly, nominate him! You're the damn HoH - you know you could have done that, right?

Evicted: April. How funny that April and Libra have to be in the Jury House alone together for a week.

Dan is the Lamest Contestant Ever. "I vote to evict Jer- I vote to evict April." Oh jeez Dan, you really had me going for a minute there. Unfunny idiot.

Endurance Head of Household competition - grrr. So it's To Be Continued.

I'm pretty sure Ollie is the only one left that I like.

It's a... Zuma? WTF?

Gwen Stefani and her rocker husband Gavin Rossdale welcomed their second child, a son, on Thursday in Los Angeles, PEOPLE has learned.

Zuma Nesta Rock Rossdale was born at 12:46 p.m. and weighed 8 1/2 lbs. He joins the couple's other son Kingston, who turned 2 in May.

I thought Zuma was a girl's name....

Project Runway: What a Drag (Get It? Har Har)

CHRIS MARCH! The Greatest Contestant in the History of Contestants! Drag queen challenge! The funniest part was when the drag queens came in for fittings without any makeup and in regular clothes, LOL! So cute! And they were the Most Critical Models Ever. It was hysterical.

Daniel is a pretentious A-hole. And he didn't want to do sequins because they're gaudy. Hello - drag!!!

Suede had a vision of his dead grandfather, who helped inspire his dress. Like, he showed up in the work room? Oooookaaaaaay.

I'm so over Keith and his fringe, swatches, whatever! His dress was so boring and looked like it was made out of old newspaper.

There were so many fabulous outfits! It was definitely a fun runway show, and for the most part the designers were awesome.

Guest Judge: RuPaul, who is awesome.

Winner: Joe. The straight guy wins the drag queen challenge! Love it! He's really cool; I like him.

Bye-bye: Daniel. That was a bit of a surprise, just cuz I thought Keith was worse. Michael Kors said Keith's looked like a "sad chicken." Oh yes!

Tim Line of the Day: "It looks like it's a pterodactyl out of a gay Jurassic Park." And he was spot-on! And Blayne took it as a compliment. Which, in this challenge, it probably was.

B&C Baby of the Week

Matt Damon's wife, Luciana, gave birth to a baby girl named Gia Zavala in Miami today. Matt's rep said, "Everyone's doing great. She is a healthy baby girl."

I love them, I love the cute kids, I love that they live in Miami. UGH!

This Saddened Me

Seriously, this guy is hysterical and awesome and seems so nice. Maybe he is nice. A nice crackhead.

Craig Robinson of The Office and Pineapple Express pleaded guilty Wednesday in a Los Angeles court to a felony count of possession of ecstasy.

"The judge allowed him to enter a drug-diversion program," said L.A. District Attorney spokeswoman Jane Robison. "If he completes counseling and stays clean for 18 months, the case will be dismissed."

One felony charge of methamphetamine possession and a misdemeanor charge of being under the influence were dropped.

Robinson, 36, who plays warehouse supervisor Darryl Philbin on the NBC comedy, was pulled over for a traffic violation in Culver City, Calif., on June 29, and officers discovered drugs in his car.

Please Be True!

Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams are a couple again, reports LaineyGossip.

Ryan, 27, and Rachel, 31, went on a date at Grace restaurant on College Street in Toronto, Canada around 10PM on Monday night. The couple walked in holding hands!

A few weeks ago, Ryan and Rachel were photographed together after he deejayed at the Green Door lounge in Hollywood.

Seriously, one of my favoritest couples. I hope they're together and happy. *sigh*

BBX: Power of Veto

Just noticed Memphis got rid of that horrid 'stache thing. Yay!

Ollie really crapped the bed on that Veto Competition. Idiot. Power of Veto: Dan.

I can't stand Jerry. He called Dan "Judas" for days, but as soon as he needs him he begs and kisses his ass. Ass. Enough with the "street fighter" analogy, Jerry! We get it.

I forgot about the bribe money that April has! Ooooo... bribes! Awkward bribes!

Dan didn't use the Power of Veto, but did call April out for offering him money. Ha ha!

I was all manic and crazy-hyper before watching this episode. It has now killed my buzz with its boredom and pointlessness. Thanks, Big Brother. Buzzkiller.

Disney = Sexy

It doesn't take a lot of foresight to realize the list of acceptable words or phrases acceptable to print little girl underpants is very short. But apparently the people involved in the production of Disney High School Musical panties either lack the skill of looking ahead or just aren't very bright when it comes to double entrendre.

A British woman bought a pack of High School Musical underpants for her seven-year-old granddaughter was appalled to find the words "Dive In" on one of pairs.

I thought the whole thing with High School Musical is that the chicks don't wear panties. So the cross-promotion makes no sense from the start.

source

Pineapple Express

This movie was really funny. Maybe not as laugh-out-loud funny as Tropic Thunder, but still good in a different way. There was more action. It was pretty violent. And there was lots and lots of pot smoking. You will want to smoke pot when you see this movie. If you're a degenerate.

THUG LIFE!

Soccer Hooligans Are The BEST

Look at this photo. Stare at it. Look closely at those guys on the ledge. Get it?

It's awesome!

BBX: Nominations

Ewww creepy Jerry stalking Ollie and April and always showing up when they're laying together. Gross!

Renny was freaking out over getting pictures of her mother, and it was cute. But then I found out she was dead and that's kind of weird. That Renny is a trip.

Boring-ass episode!

Nominated: April and Jerry.

B&C Happy Sigh of the Week

Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi married in front of 19 guests during an intimate ceremony at their home in Beverly Hills Saturday night.

Portia wore a backless, light pink dress, while Ellen opted for pants, button-up shirt and vest — all in white.

SO CUTE! YAY for them!

8 For 8 Baby!!!

Eat that, All Other Countries!!! Way to make Baltimore proud, Michael Phelps!!! (As if I care that much about Bmore.)

For reals, I was just up on my feet, laughing and making swimming motions with my arms throughout the race. I think it totes helped!!!

If you're not first you're LAST!! Second place is first place for LOSERS!!

U S A! U S A!

I Fangirl Jim Gaffigan

We saw Jim Gaffigan in Miami and he was great! This was our second time seeing him and he amazes me. He's the only comic I know who can open with an ear-splitting "eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!" and everyone goes nuts. Also, he works pretty clean and yet I still love him.

I think it's due to his main topics: laziness and food. Yes, he did the Hot Pockets jokes and yes, I had parts of them memorized - but I still laughed so hard! I'm so with him on being too lazy to recycle and make the bed. Like he said, "I don't re-tie my shoes after I take them off, why would I make the bed? I'm planning to be back in it in a few hours." (Only he said it, you know, funnier.)

This video is his take on his Greasy Lover, Bacon.

HAHAHAHA

It happened to me with Star Trek and now it's happening to you Harry Potter lovers.

In a last-minute move, Warner Brothers has just announced that the studio is pulling Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince from its fall lineup and rescheduled it for July 17, 2009.

As for why the film was pushed out of fall, the studio explained in a statement that summertime is the “ideal window for a family tent pole release.”

That quote sounds terribly pornographic to me. Maybe I'll see this movie after all.

BBX: Eviction

I was so excited going into this week's show because either Libra or Keesha is going home. I hope it's Libra, but either way it means they're being broken up so that makes me happy.

LOL at Dan playing the sympathy card with everyone feeling bad for him because Jerry picks on him and calls him Judas. I do love that he's exploiting that.

LOL at April saying Keesha doesn't like her because April's prettier and Keesha is 30 and works at Hooters and never went to college.

Damn Big Brother for making me sympathize with Libra because her husband and family are so damned cute!

Evicted: Libra. She's also the first Jury Member. So she has to leave the House, but still doesn't get to see her kids. HA!

Ollie - get rid of that stripe of hair on your chin. But keep flying under the radar, because I think you can win this thing.

What happened to America's Player? Did I miss something? Did we give up that idea this week? I thought there was going to be a new one each week, but then again I don't pay that much attention to this show.

Head of Household: Renny. The old lady is ruling the house!!

Watch Out Sam Jackson

That's all I'm saying... watch out. These things come in threes.

I Give Tropic Thunder Thunderous Applause

Thankfully, this movie totally lived up to the hype and was hysterical. It opens with these hysterical fake trailers for movies the actors starred in, and just stays funny the whole time.

Loads of great celebrity cameos. Robert Downey, Jr. was amazing. ("You never go full retard.") There's just one major problem with this movie:

I liked Tom Cruise in this movie!

I haven't liked a movie with Tom Cruise in it (or the man himself) except for Magnolia. But this? This is hysterical. He is hysterical. He's foul-mouthed and bizarre and I HATED myself for laughing at him.

So, in summation, Tropic Thunder is hysterical. Clearly.

Project Runway

Challenge: Designing for Brooke Shields, and specifically her character on a Show No One Watches And Will Be Canceled By Next Season. Goddamn NBC Universal and their freaking cross-promotion. That is really bothering me so far this season. Enough!

And it's a team challenge - teams of 2. Always love the drama with those. And the awkwardness of the designers presenting their concepts to the celeb-in-question. AND the awkwardness of the designers picking their teammate. Stella was Last Picked. HAHAHAHAHAHA

Tim Gunn Burns of the Day:

"It looks like a big sweet potato."

"And some of you are still sewing, question mark?" God I love a man who verbalizes his punctuation.

I can't say I was overwhelmed by any of the designs. I hated Jerell's, but the judges loved it. What do I know. Maybe it was just the belt that bothered me.

OMG, I love Kenley even more for busting out laughing when Daniel defended himself and was all, "I have impeccable, high-end taste" - I was doing the same thing!!

Winner: Keith. He only won cuz he had Kenley on his team and she's all things lovely.

Bye-bye: Kelli. Her design was definitely trashy, but I loved her so much overall. So BOO!

Next week: Chris March returns! Designing for drag queens!!! Oh god I'm excited!!

BBX: Power of Veto

Man, how did Big Brother go from being awesome to being boring? Oh, that's right, that's how this show always operates. The set-up and Veto Competition were pretty boring tonight. Dan and Memphis's little waking-up-people thing was the lamest thing ever, just like everything Dan does.

Power of Veto: Jerry. He wants Dan to go up.

Memphis's toast: Worst Toast Ever. Stick to mixing the drinks, kid.

Then the show got good. Why? WINE! Everyone got all drunken and lovey during the Feast. Except Jerry, who took Dan's apology and crapped all over it. LOL Jerry. Libra turned on the waterworks, but only succeeded in making me hate her more. She threw Keesha under the bus for orchestrating Jessie's eviction.

Then Michelle and April stirred things up between Keesha and Libra, leading to a 4-way confrontation. "Let's go there then!" Yes please!! Drunken bitches go nuts!

No change to the nominations, it's still Libra and Keesha. I hope Libra goes.

Very Cool Heroes Casting News

This is really cool, I hope it happens. I love Seth and Breckin and them together, on my favorite show? Magical.

Real-life BFFs and frequent collaborators Seth Green and Breckin Meyer are nearing a deal to join the cast of Heroes for multi-episode arcs, sources confirm to me exclusively.

As I first teased in this week's episode of Ausiello TV, the duo will play Atlanta-based comic book aficionados who cross paths with (and perhaps serve as advisors to) one of the Heroes.

source

BBX: Nominations

I got to watch Big Brother tonight with Faithful Readers Mike and Kim... excellent. The show started off great, picking up from where Jessie was kicked off. Libra gloated, Jerry went ape-S again, then the whole freaking house went ape-S!!! I've never seen the whole house erupt like this, just about everyone was screaming, all loud and yelling over each other. Best House Fight Ever!

But then just as soon as that was over, and some mild bitching and conniving, everyone seemed to get along again. And then another lame food competition, whatever.

Nominated: Libra and Keesha. Michelle made the right decision there.

Eating My Way Through Pennsylvania

So of course most of the activities on my Pennsylvania vacation have revolved around drinking and food. Food I can't get in Florida.

Like Five Guys - I think it might be better than In N Out. Their fries definitely are - that picture is pure 100% food porn.




OK, so I just found out there is a Five Guys in Florida. Still, I haven't had it for over TWO YEARS!

And then Wegman's! I got to shop at Wegman's again! And buy a pound of cookies.





Greatest Foodcation Ever.

Chance for Hottest Ticket Ever - OVER

John Edwards repeatedly lied during his Presidential campaign about an extramarital affair with a novice filmmaker, the former Senator admitted to ABC News today.

In an interview for broadcast tonight on Nightline, Edwards told ABC News correspondent Bob Woodruff he did have an affair with 44-year old Rielle Hunter, but said that he did not love her.

Edwards also denied he was the father of Hunter's baby girl, Frances Quinn, although the one-time Democratic Presidential candidate said he has not taken a paternity test.

Edwards said he knew he was not the father based on timing of the baby's birth on February 27, 2008. He said his affair ended too soon for him to have been the father.

So much for the Hot-Ass Obama/Edwards ticket. *SIGH*

B&C Hot Dude of the Week

This dude used to be a hot chick.

BBX: Eviction

Had to watch Big Brother at CBS.com today, since it was on opposite SYTYCD last night and I didn't have DVR access. Thanks for ruining it by saying it came down to a tie, CBS. Thanks.

But it couldn't have worked out more perfectly, with Dan being the person in the middle that both sides were trying to get. He made promises to both sides, yet he had to vote the way America wanted him to. NICE!

So America chose Jessie to be evicted. Damn, because I really liked him stirring stuff up. Oh wells.

Head of Household: Michelle. Vengeance will be hers!!!

SYTYCD FINALE

This show is over. Sadness. I will miss it, I can't believe it's already over.

Mary Murphy danced a routine and I went nuts! I've never seen her dance before. That was cool. Then Nigel got up and did some wicked tap dancing with members of the Debbie Allen Dance Academy and I giggled with delight!!

I was on-board with all of the dances that were chosen as the best of the season. Though, am I right that nothing beats that Neil and Sabra conference-table routine from last year? That door routine might be close though. I guess I like the use of props.

How fun was it seeing past dancers in the Best Of routine? Fun! NEIL! NEIL IS MY DANCE GOD!

Results:

4. Courtney. Excellent.

3. Katee. Damn. I thought for sure she should have been #2 (and would have been fine with #1). She got $50,000 for being the top girl, though. Yay, cash!

2. Twitch

1. JOSHUA!!!! I CAN'T SCREAM BECAUSE BABIES ARE SLEEPING SO I'LL JUST CAPSLOCK IT!!!! GO JOSHUA!!!!!!!!

How awesome that there were two untrained street dancers at the top. GO SHOW!

SYTYCD Finale Performances: 4 Real!

1. Twitch and Courtney - Tabitha & Napoleon Hip Hop. My favorite hip hop. That was an ambitious move, trying to spin her on the top of his head. Didn't exactly work, but that was a tough move.

2. Katee and Joshua. A Wade Robson routine - FINALLY! They were so amazingly in sync. Awesome, of course. Beautiful.

3. Katee and Courtney (oooo - they did same-sex couples, awesome) - Broadway. It was frilly and girly and a lame, happy routine. But they were fine. It was clear Katee was better, she extends just a little bit farther all the time.

4. Joshua and Twitch - some Russian nutcracker dance. Holy crap! I thought for sure they'd be doing a crump or a hip-hop, but this was FIERCE! It was like a Russian dance battle. They were throwing each other around and jumping so far off the ground. So tough!

5. Katee and Twitch - Foxtrot. I thought it was gorgeous, she was great during it. I didn't get to see what all the judges had to say because we had a bit of a power outage. So I missed Mary's critique. Damn!

6. Courtney and Joshua - Jive. He makes it look so easy. SO EASY!

7. Group Routine - Mia Michaels routine. Of course. Much love for an orchestral version of an awesome Paramore song ("Hallelujah")! That was kickass!! It was such a tough, fun dance. And wow, they were so exhausted afterward. Courtney was so out of her league in that.

So here's how I would break it down:

4. Courtney
3. Twitch
2. Katee
1. Joshua

Project Runway

Blayne is so tanorexic and creepy. Addict. HATE!

Challenge: designing an outfit to be worn by the American team at the Olympics Opening Ceremony. (Way to cross-promote, NBC!)

Joe's was very good, very Sporty Spice. Pretty perfect, except for the "USA" on the skort, I could do without that. I liked Korto's and Terri's little pants outfits too. Korto wins.

Jerell's was a costume, just too weird for this challenge. Nina was right - it was Mary Had A Little Lamb!

Kelli's was adorable, but not relevant either. Everybody who did flouncy skirts? INAPPROPRIATE!

That Apolo Ohno was a really good judge. He was unexpectedly insightful!

Bye-bye: Jennifer and her flouncy skirt. Bye-bye blandest contestant ever!!!

IT'S A HEROES COUNTDOWN

BBX: Power of Veto

America's Player Dan has to hug Jessie for 10 seconds. LOL. He gives him a sob story about his girlfriend and how cute was Jessie - he was actually all supportive and cute!!!! Dammit - now I like Jessie!

GIRLFIGHT!! And then Jerry joins in. Good lord, that was a GREAT SHOUTING MATCH! Jessie got zero chance to defend himself. And it was even better because it surrounded the lamest birthday party ever. L O freaking L!

During the veto competition April won this cool prize of ten $1000 gold bars. They can be used in the house at any time. So now they're introducing bribes. Like, if she's on the block and wants to be taken off, she could give money to the Veto holder. Brilliant!

Michelle's rampage about having to wear the unitard was hysterical! This house is full of crazy chicks!

Power of Veto: Jerry. Didn't use it, natch.

BBX: Nominations

First up: the conclusion of the endurance Head of Household competition. Jesus, Jessie was really in some pain, wasn't he? With his super-strength? That's weird. Old-ass Renny hung in way longer. And April and Michelle hung in WAY long.

HoH: April, who swore she wouldn't nominate Jessie or Michelle. Why was I not aware of Michelle and Jessie's close relationship? I mean, he was like crying when she was in pain. Where did that come from?

Dan: Lame Motivational Speaker or the Lamest Motivational Speaker?

Nominated: Memphis and Jessie. HOLY CRAP! She went back on her word. WHAT THE HELL? No one ever does that on this show!

THE TWINS!!

I mean, you can barely see them, but still - THE TWINS! I'll take any pics of my Favorite Family.

Step-Brothers

Yes, Step-Brothers is hysterical, I'm happy to report. It's maybe the most absurd Will Ferrell movie ever, which is saying a lot. I mean, he and John C. Reilly are practically retarded. If they had actually made them retarded, it would have made a little more sense.

But what sense do you need in a comedy? It was hysterical, I love that it was rated R, and it had dick, fart, and balls humor. I love me some balls humor!!! BALLS!