SYTYCD: Performances

Guest Judges: Christina Applegate and Lil' C. And Orange Mary. Jesus, she is an unnatural shade of orange and so are her boobs. Her big old boobs.

1. Melanie and Twitch - Hip Hop by Tabitha & Napoleon. It was good. I mean, I wasn't really feeling the song, and it was weird to dance to, but she held her own for sure. Pretty good for a Pixie-haired white girl.

2. Sasha and Kent - Contemporary by Tyce. Oh crap - Kent, son! And OMFG it was a crazy-ass, intense routine that involved a wall and it was just crazy. This bitch needs to win. End of story.

3. Marko and Janette - Paso Doble by Some Dude. Marko was great. I mean, so was Janette but that's a no-brainer - I loved watching her skirt fly around. There was a cool trick in it and it was well done.

4. Tadd and Ellenore - Jazz by Sonya. I love Ellenore and her kooky style - pair her with Sonya and it's awesome. Add Tadd and it rules. He literally was swinging from a chandelier several times. Pretty cool. Nigel was right that there needed to be more dancing, but it was a nice piece. OK, maybe I'm disturbed that his nipples are prominently displayed in his sheer shirt.

5. Ricky and Jaimie - Contemporary by Dee Caspary. Damn, we are getting all the cool All Stars tonight!! I loved seeing Jaimie again. And they were really good together - it was a long, lean, lovely routine.

6. Caitlynn and Pasha - Samba by A Dude. Enough Pasha already. I know they need a male ballroom dancer, but Christ. Actually, it was really good and Caitlynn was surprisingly great!

7. Sasha and Ricky - Waacking by Some Chick. Waacking? Yep, Waacking. Not sure how to explain it - kind of disco-y but with lots of arm movements? It was cool and Sasha just proved she's awesome at everything. She deserved better than Ricky.

8. Melanie and Tadd - Broadway by Spencer Liff. Oh man, they deserve better than Broadway. It was actually an interesting routine though and they were good together. I love them both.

9. Caitlynn and Marko - Jazz by Sonya. It was an awesome routine - one of Sonya's slower Jazz routines. Loads of really cool moves. Marko's so strong and amazing and she was really good too!!!! Hmmmmm, she's been great tonight, and that's when you really want to prove yourself. Good for her.

But let's say goodbye to Caitlynn and Ricky tomorrow, OK, America? It's gotta be Sasha, man. Just Sasha. I mean, Melanie is a superclose second, but it is ALL ABOUT Sasha.