Guest Judges: Choreographer/Director Rob Marshall (a disturbing shade of orange) and Lady Gaga (her blue hair has nothing on Rob's orange face). Gaga ends up being constructively-critical; I'm a fan.
1. Sasha and Pasha (it rhymes!) - Quick Step by Some Dude. That's a hard style to judge, but she was great, of course. I just worry it won't connect with voters. (Yes, I worry about these things.)
2. Caitlynn and Ivan (who?) - Hip Hop by Some Crosseyed Dude. It was the most typically-crappy hip hop routine you could imagine. That's what a crosseyed choreographer and a white boy dancer gets you.
3. Jordan and Ade (yay!) - Jazz by Tyce. I love how Tyce has been slammed lately for his lazy-ass Broadway choreography. He annoys me. His Jazz is always 100 times better, and this was a decent routine. Loads of extensions and flexibility from Jordan.
4. Melanie and Neil (my boyfriend!!) - Contemporary by Mandy Moore. It was definitely athletic and flawless, with one massive jump-into-his-arms moment. The judges were creaming themselves over it. And yeah, they're probably the best dancers, but I wasn't THAT blown away by it. Do I need to clean my glasses or something? I think the song distracted me - "Total Eclipse of the Heart".
5. Ricky and Anya - Jive by Jason Gilkison. That's a tough one because you're always going to look at Anya's old ass, not the dude's. She even flipped his twink ass up in the air and over her head. It was fine and safe and forgettable.
6. Jess and Brunette Lauren - Hip Hop by Tabitha & Napoleon. Honestly, it would have been a great routine with another dude. Someone strong and tough? Yeah. Jess? No.
7. Tadd and Blond Lauren (yay!) - Jazz by Mandy Moore. It was the most fun routine so far and I really like them as a couple.
8. Marko and Allison - Contemporary by Sonya. I am loving the lovely-not-quirky Sonya style lately. They had such gorgeous, fluid movement and were perfectly in sync. They make a really strong couple. Gaga cried, though I'm not sure why. Probably for attention.
And now we get regular couplings.
9. Tadd and Caitlynn - Foxtrot by Some Dude. It was a classic, lovely dance and I thought they were elegant and beautiful. It doesn't make you pick up the phone, but it makes you smile.
10. Marko and Ricky - Hip Hop by Tabitha & Napoleon. Male/male pairing hell yeah! It was pretty much the bomb, and the only way it could have been better if it was Marko and Tadd. Gotta love a high-energy, difficult routine set to old school Puff Daddy!
11. Jordan and Jess - Rumba by Jason Gilkison. Oh hell no he isn't going to be able to lift her big ass! The rumba is slow and weird. It's a lot of vamping and dragging about. He was incidental - no chemistry, you just focused on Jordan's big red ass. Nigel called her swayback deformed. Ha! The Adele song deserved way better.
12. Melanie and Sasha - Jazz by Sonya. OH HOLY CRAP THE 2 BEST GIRLS!! (Man, if they had paired Tadd and Marko my face would have exploded tonight!) Quirky, jazzy Sonya is back and I loved it! They were just wonderful together, so awesome and precise. Something tells me they'll be performing together in the finale too.
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