07 March 2010

The Real World: DC Continues to Disappoint

The greatest sound I've ever heard: Andrew moan-whining after hitting the ground. Tragically, he was faking. DAMMIT! I was hoping for massive head damage. Nope, he's still just a dumbass making dumb jokes about his penis hurting and needing Emily to touch it.

Once they show it in slo-mo, it's not the big deal I wanted it to be. Ty totally tried to grab his legs on the way down, and had a hold of him enough so that Andrew just kind of slid down to the sidewalk. BUZZKILL!

Everyone's a bunch of drama queens, of course - it went from a 6-foot balcony to a 10-foot balcony, depending on who you asked. And they all thought Ty threw him from it. The girls are taking the opportunity to cry and worry over Andrew - but he's still a drunken, unfunny asshole. He's fine. Jesus. AND STOP CALLING HIM PANDA!!!

You know what all this drama queen nonsense means: HOUSE MEETING. People, if he had really pushed Andrew off, the producers would have kicked him out right away. Get over it. I'll say it -- they feel threatened because he's a big black dude. Racists.

Ty swears off drinking. Sure, that'll take. I swore off drinking too. It lasted 3 years. And I wasn't living in a phat house in DC surrounded by drunkards. It only seems to take one sober party and he starts back up again. Emily is a flaming bitch and is like, You have to leave the house because you drank again. She's a nutjob and a flaming C. DIE!

Ty, Andrew, and Josh crack me up later when they start making fun of the "intervention" and flat-out saying that the girls were afraid of Ty because he's black. Ahahah. Nice one, boys.

Ty, trying to break free of America's stereotypes, gets an internship with the Washington Capitals, the hockey team. Ty, living up to America's stereotypes, can't ice skate for crap.

Andrew's younger brother visits. Wow, he's just like Andrew - he walks in in a really horrible wolf tee shirt and they hug weirdly. Oh god and he has weird facial hair that looks like failed muttonchops. DIE!

I was totally looking forward to this episode, hoping for head trauma, and instead I got melodrama. Boooooo.


Kim said...

I wish Emily would have met with producers to tell them that she wanted Ty kicked off so they could have said "ummm you don't have that authority".

KI4GSZ said...