23 March 2009


Jack and Tony hook up at the Port of Alexandria to intercept the bioweapons. They work with the officer on duty, who is helping the bad guys break into the port (he thought they were just smuggling consumer products, not WMDs). The officer's name is Carl. How do I know his name is Carl? Because someone said it every freaking 6 seconds. Carl Carl Carl Carl Carl. I get it. If it were a drinking game, I'd have alcohol poisoning.

Jack promised Carl he would be safe. And so he was. Jack kills the guy that was going to kill Carl, which means he just made it a firefight. FIREFIGHT!!

The cargo container makes it onto a truck, which Jack then jumps on top of and highjacks. Leaving his boy Tony behind. NOT COOL!

Jack calls Agent EyesTooCloseTogether and tells him he's got the weapons and Tony's being held hostage. Then he pulls over, I guess because his Bauer Senses are tingling. The container is damaged and there's a leak in one of the Whatjamacallits. Jack holds his breath and turns off the valve, but is exposed to whatever the heck this is in the process. Suddenly the bad guys show up with a helicopter and open fire. They end up getting the weapons off of the truck. And Tony's all gagged and hostaged and S in the back of a car. *sad face*

Hey, it's the First Gentleman! He survived his surgery! And I get to use that crappy term "First Gentleman" again!

The Chief of Staff resigns because he's afraid of getting the President in trouble for that go-ahead-and-torture crap he pulled. Crap that led to the death of a Senator. So he resigns and the President is almost crying. THIS IS WHY WOMEN CAN'T BE PRESIDENT!! (Turns out the First Daughter did indeed leak the information to the press, and tips them off to his resignation as well.)

Line of the Day: The President said something along the lines of "Maybe this day will end well after all." You know what show you're on, yes? Never say that. NEVER. Because it won't. Ever.

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