24 April 2009

Prison Break Double Feature

Twice the Fun or Twice the Pain? Definitely pain. I really don't like watching a once-kickass show die a slow, painful death. I figure if I knock out two episodes at once it'll go away quicker.

Dear God this show hasn't been on in ages, and it's been eons since it was any good. The Brothers' mother is the bad guy now, that's all I know. That, and it's set in Miami now.

So Lincoln's trying to get Scylla to the General and Michael's trying to keep it from him, right? I think we're supposed to be impressed that Mom is badass and threatening and at odds with the General. I'm not.

Lincoln follows some clues Mom left to meet up with her. She claims she's going to help and find a way for the Brothers to live free, but she's a manipulative psycho, so I don't know.

Sure enough, Mom orders Lincoln to be gunned down, but his buddies Mahone, T-Bag, and Michael Rapaport see the gunman first and prevent it. They end up following Mom to the Indian Embassy of all places. WHUT!? Please tell me this isn't just an excuse to make a circular Taj Mahal reference back to the first season. Oh Christ. I think it is. Plus Mom wants to partner up with India on Scylla.

Michael (who is fat now) and Sara stow away in the back of a semi. When it is commandeered by a Company agent, they break out the only way they can - MacGruber style. Naturally, they also find some random clue on a piece of paper in the dude's pocket.

Sara somehow gets into a friend's Miami condo. That's convenient, that she had that friend, with that condo, who wasn't in it, and somehow had a key. And as if that weren't enough of a violation of her friend, SARA TAKES ONE OF HER PREGNANCY TESTS!

A. Why does the friend have a pregnancy test in her medicine cabinet if she only uses the condo once a year? Women don't keep pregnancy tests around. They buy them when they need them, take them quickly, then get the morning after pill. B. When did Sara have the chance to get pregnant? I can't even recall them having sex. I should expect nothing less from this show, though. By which I mean I should expect nothing.

Michael and Sara follow the Random Clue to a car and determine that the driver was to pick up some Sandinsky dude at the airport. So they head to the airport to pick him up. Luckily, it's a small airport so Michael can go through all of the flight logs with all of the passengers in 4 seconds flat. He can also break into the Air Traffic Control tower and force the one guy working there to tell the plane to land where he and Sara can get to it. They nab Sandinsky as he's coming off the plane, chased by Mom's people, who also want Sandinsky.

Mahone saves their lives, but Lincoln's Gang gets Sandinsky. And, oh great, Sara's pregnant. This show stinks.

Only TWO episodes left. Best news I've heard all day.

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